Come What May
by prettypicking
Summary: This was it. It was now or never. 'I think I love you.' I breathed. He blinked, unmoving. My heart was hammering against my chest. Was I too late?
1. Chapter 1

**This is my first fanfiction so I would be eternally grateful for any reviews and criticisms that you have to help me improve it! Sorry if this first chapter is slightly dull, once I get into the swing of it I'm hoping to make it a lot more exciting. Thank you for reading!**

**Disclamer: I do not own Harry Potter or anything to do with it, it's all J.K Rowlings.**

Standing on the familiar platform 9 ¾, I felt a wave of emotions run through me. Excitement. Happiness. Nervousness. Sadness. Excitement – I was returning to my home, my true home, the one place I had friends, the one place that made me feel welcome. Happiness – I would be seeing my friends again, after six weeks apart, we can soon start gossiping again, I'm sure they have plenty to tell me, being the only Muggle born out of them. Nervousness – in my letter from Hogwarts this year, I had found a surprise. I had been made Head Girl. Although I was looking forward to being Head Girl, I was also nervous, I have no idea who Head Boy is, and in about thirty minutes, I will be facing a carriage full of Prefects, having to give them instructions on what to do this year. I hadn't planned anything to say to them, I figured that when I got up there, and everyone was looking at me, I would completely forget what I had planned to say, so I decided on improvisation. Sadness – I wouldn't see my family until December, I hated saying goodbye to them. Also, this was my last ever year at Hogwarts, after this year was over, I would never set foot on the Hogwarts Express, or Hogwarts, for that matter, ever again. It was also very doubtful that I would see the majority of my friends again. We would all be going our separate ways in the wizarding world, and what with Voldemort getting more powerful by the day, there was a strong possibility that they, or even myself, could get... No, I couldn't let myself think that way. This was one of the most memorable moments of my life, and I won't ruin it, or let Voldemort ruin it.

"LILY!" A huge grin sweeps across my face as I spin around to the sound of one of my favourite voices.

"ALICE!" My feet momentarily leave the floor as she hugs me a little too enthusiastically.

"How have you been? Oh my god, I have so much to tell you Lily!"

"You do?" I didn't think that much could have occurred over the holidays to make that look creep its way on to Alice's face. But obviously it could.

"Yes. But I think we should get on the train first. I've just said bye to mum and dad, they had to leave a bit early." Alice looked around, then she looked back at me. "Where are you parents, Lily?"

I tried to keep the sadness out of my voice. "Oh, they erm.. they couldn't come. They couldn't get the time off work. And Petunia wouldn't come, she's too busy organising her wedding with the walrus, not to mention the fact that she hates me." I told mum and dad not to worry about not being able to see me off, they felt so guilty they couldn't be here. But not wanting to keep the attention on me for too long, I changed the subject. "Lets get on the train, then we can find Marlene and Mary, and you can tell us all about your news." Alice's face instantly perked up at that.

.

"You're WHAT?"

"Engaged. I'M ENGAGED!" Alice began to jump up and down in excitement, and, even though I was completely shocked, I couldn't help but join in.

"Alice! This is so great! Eeeeeeeeee!" After a few minutes, our breathing had started to come in little gasps, so we took that as a sign to stop jumping. Mary and I had both congratulated Alice, during which there had been many squeals, but Marlene had not even uttered a word. Mary sat beside her and looked into her eyes, clicking her fingers as if to bring her out of a trance.

"Marlene, are you okay?" Marlene blinked, and then looked at Alice, her face turning into a look of pure pleasure.

"ALICE! Oh my god, this is huge! Huge, but amazing." She leapt up to suffocate Alice in a hug.

"You are so lucky, you and Frank are perfect for each other."

"They are, aren't they?" Clearly a rhetorical question. Then I sighed. "I wish I had someone."

Everyone looked at me. Marlene and Alice glanced at each other, mischievous grins sweeping across their faces.

"But you do, Lily." Alice sat down beside me and slung her arm over my shoulders.

"I do?"

"Oh yes, Lily. You do." Marlene sat on my other side, and she also slung her arm over my shoulders.

"Who?"

Mary placed both her hands on my knees, considering there was no room beside me.

"Does a certain Mr Potter ring any bells?" She whispered. This threw me.

"James?" I asked blankly.

"The very one."

"But... why would you think him? I hated him up until a few months ago! And he only has a crush on me, and that's only because I'm the one girl who won't give into his 'charm'." I finished my sentence by folding my arms rather harshly, accidentally elbowing Alice and Marlene in the ribs.

"I think you are forgetting the fact that the two of you spent an awful lot of time together towards the end of last term. And he doesn't just have a crush on you, how delusional you are Lily, the poor boy is in love with you." Mary looked rather pleased with herself after that.

Sure, me and James did spent quite a bit of time together towards the end of last term, but that was only because I realized that he had changed a bit, and I figured if I spent a bit more time around him, I would be able to decide whether he had or not. Plus, the four of us had actually become quite good friends with the Marauders, Merlin knows how that happened, but we spent the majority of our time together in those last few weeks of the sixth year. But for James to be in love with me, that's just ridiculous! I mean, I know he asked me out literally every day from fifth year, but I just figured that was some joke of his he was doing just to annoy me. They must have got the wrong information, there is no way James Potter could be in love with me!

"Would you look at that, Lily is lost for words!"

"No I'm not! You've just got your information wrong, that's all. James is not in love with me!"

"Oh believe me, Lily, we have an extremely reliable source." Huh, so someone had told them this information, had they? "Oh yeah? Who's that then?"

"Mr Potter himself."

"What?"

"That's right, Lily, he told us himself."

"But... what.. how... this... ugh!" I continued to splutter as I looked down at my watch, and realised that I had only seven minutes to make it down to the prefect carriage. "I have to go to the Head's meeting now, but this is not over!" And with that, I dramatically swept out of the compartment.

James could not be in love with me, could he? But now I think of it, everything adds up. How he acts around me, how protective he is of me, how he hates it if another boy so much as looks at me. Oh Merlin, James Potter is in love with me! Hold on. Why does this make me happy? Why do I get a certain feeling, or why do butterflies fly around in my stomach, when I think of James? Do I like him? No, of course I don't. I'm just being ridiculous. Why would I like James? Sure, he has a nice personality now, and I can't deny that I like how protective he is over me, and don't get me started on his body... What! What am I talking about? I need to stop this, I forbid myself to think about James Potter! Think of the prefect meeting, Lily! In which you only have three minutes to get there.

I hurtled my way through the carriages, my annoyance that the prefects compartment was right at the front of the train steadily increasing. I was just about to enter the last carriage when I heard someone shout my name. Swearing that I would hex whoever this was, I whirled around, only to see a greasy haired boy standing in front of me.

"What do you want, Snape?" My voice was cold. I vowed to myself that I would never be friends with him again, I couldn't stand him.

"I want you, Lily. I want to go back to how we were. I want to be friends again." His face was so sincere that I actually laughed at him, did he honestly believe that we would ever be friends again?

"Well that's too bad then. I can never forgive you for what you did, and we can never be friends again. I can't even stand the sight of you. And if you'll excuse me, I actually have somewhere to be." I turned around and stalked into the last carriage, maybe it was a bit too dramatically, as I suddenly knocked into someone and fell on the floor. From somewhere nearby I heard a low chuckle, and then strong arms lifted me off the floor. I looked up to see who it was, and I felt myself blushing as I looked into the hazel eyes of James Potter. Why was I blushing? I had no reason to. If anyone should be blushing, it should be him, he's the one who is apparently 'in love' with me. Unless... no. Stop right there Lily Evans, don't even think of unless.

"Ah, it seems that Miss Evans managed to make it." James set me down on my feet and addressed the prefects, a little too sarcastically for my liking.

"Well, yes. Sorry about that. I unfortunately ran into an ex friend." Everyone was looking at me with confused expressions, James included. "Snape." I whispered to him.

He seemed to understand. I saw his face change and expression was becoming stonier by the minute. Not wanting anyone to see this, I changed the subject. "So, should we get started then?"

There were various grunts and nods of heads as the prefects began to make their way into the compartment. I had to practically drag James in.

.

All in all, the meeting wasn't actually that bad. I only stumbled over a few words, and the improvisation couldn't have gone better if I planned it, which obviously I didn't, as it is called 'improvisation'. James had to explain to me three times that he was Head Boy, until I finally had to believe him. I was shocked, however, to hear what he had to say in the meeting. He told everyone that they were not allowed to abuse their powers, if they did, fifty points would be taken from them and a meeting would be set up with their heads of house to discuss their future as a prefect. He also told them that if anyone caused them any trouble, or if anyone used magic against them, they had his permission to fight back and defend themselves, and that if any teachers or pupils had a problem with that, they should go and see him. Did this mean that he had changed, after all? I could certainly see a difference in him, that was for sure. But maybe I would just have to stay around him for a bit longer, to be certain that he had changed. The thought of being around him caused butterflies to erupt in my stomach.

"You coming, Lily?" I looked up to see that the compartment was empty apart from myself and James. He was at the door and waiting for me to join him.

"Mhm." Hold on a minute, he didn't call me Evans. "You called me Lily."

"Yeaaah, that is kind of your name..." He was looking at me as if I was mentally handicapped.

"You always call me Evans."

"Lily, I haven't called you Evans for over two months. When we became friends, you asked me to call you Lily, remember?" Oh Merlin, I did remember it now. What is wrong with me? Why does my brain turn to mulsh whenever I'm around him? And I know it definitely isn't because I fancy him, because I don't. I hate him! No, I don't, that's just a reflex reaction. I must stop telling everyone I hate him.

"What is wrong with you today? You're acting really weird."

"I am?" Of course you are, you idiot! "Huh. I think it's just because this is it, it's our last year here, and I'm kind of a bit freaked out by it. Do you know what I mean?" Great cover story there, Miss Evans.

"Yeah, I know what you mean, it's like, this time next year, we'll have jobs! Or be in training. It's kind of cool really, although I am going to miss Hogwarts. But lets get going, yeah?"

Going? "Where are we going?" Okay, he must think I'm a right lunatic. But he doesn't need to prolong the pronunciation of the words to make me feel about five years old.

"To. Our. Compartment."

"Right, yeah, that would make sense." We left the prefect compartment and began to make our way back through the train. Only to be stopped minutes later by Snape.

"What is it now!" I was finally losing my patience with him, didn't he get it? I never wanted to see him again!

"Why are you with Potter?" I think I actually got a bit of spit on me when he spat 'Potter'. So was it up to him who I was or wasn't friends with, then?

"What does it matter to you? And for the record, me and _James_," I made sure he noticed that I called him by his first name, "are friends. Not that it has anything to do with you, you filthy hypocrite. You think it is unacceptable for me to be friends with him, but the company you keep is disgusting, everyone knows you're going to be Death Eaters the moment you get out of here, so don't you dare judge me on who's company I keep!" Snape's face turned into a horrible mask of anger, and he walked towards me, causing me to retreat a few steps.

"How dare you talk to me like that, you filthy Mudblood!" I winced internally at the word, but tried not to let it show.

"Now you've done it, Snivellus." James's voice was so threatening that I whirled around in alarm. He had stepped in front of me, and he had his want out, pointing it directly at Snape. "Don't you ever talk to Lily like that again. In fact, don't you ever talk to Lily ever again. I'll know if you do. And believe me, you'll be sorry." With a swish of his wand, Snape fell to the floor, as rigid as if he were dead, but it was obvious that he had just been stunned.

James looked at me, and then grabbed my hand, pulling me along the train. Once I realised what he was doing, I pulled my hand out of his, and looked away, blushing. Why had it felt right when he held my hand? Maybe it was just because he had saved me from Snape, and I felt only gratitude towards him.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. I just never want to see Snape again. Thanks, for, you know, what you did back there." I looked up into his eyes, wanting to make my thank you more sincere than it sounded. He smiled in return.

"Don't mention it, anything to see the back of old Snivellus." He winked at me, and at that, I had to laugh. He joined in, briefly, and then we made our way back to our compartment, with, thankfully, no more interruptions.

.

Halfway through a rather entertaining game of exploding snap, the lunch trolley arrived. Peter bought as much as he could with the money that he had bought with him, Sirius toned it down a bit, compared to his usual fourth helpings at dinner, by getting a few pumpkin pasties and cauldron cakes, James had around the same amount as Sirius, and Remus bought an alarming amount of chocolate. I, however, was not really hungry, which caught me by surprise, as I had been famished on the way to the prefect meeting, but now my appetite had gone, so I bought a licorice wand just for the sake of it.

"Alice, where's Frank? I thought he would be in here with you." I'm surprised Marlene was able to talk, after just having forced her third cauldron cake in her mouth.

"Yeah, he told me that he'd come find me on the train. Where is he? I hope he's okay." Alice was starting to worry now, she was shooting furtive glances out of the window, and on several occasions, getting up and standing outside the compartment for a few minutes.

"Alice." I finally said, causing her to look at me and huff as she sat down. "I'm sure that Frank is fine, he's probably just been held up. You have nothing to worry about, so please, try and sit still, and relax."

After about half an hour, Frank walked in. Alice rushed to his side and embraced him in a hug, before stepping away from him and giving him a look of pure evil.

"And where have you been?"

"I'm sorry, Alice, I got held up! There was a first year girl who was crying because a bunch of third year Slytherins were picking on her, so I went and sorted them out. Then I had to go with her to find her some friends, and I just couldn't get away. I'm sorry." He walked towards Alice and hugged her again, then he let go of her, but he kept her hand, and they sat down, Alice finally looking relaxed.

"You guys are so cute together." Mary was looking at them with various emotions in her face. I could make out happiness, she was happy because her friend was happy. Then there was jealousy, she wanted someone who treated her like Frank treats Alice.

"You'll find someone, Mary. We can't all meet the perfect guy first time, not everyone is that lucky." I stroked her knee consolingly. And then I realised my mistake. I saw Mary's and Marlene's faces turn into an identical grin, and I knew they were remembering our conversation from earlier. I groaned.

"Ah, yes. I seem to recall that we were discussing this earlier. Isn't that right, Miss Evans?" Out of the corner of my eye, I saw James's head whip up.

"You were?" Oh crap. Marlene was going to get it later.

"Yes, we were. What was it we were saying, Lily?"

I felt my face heat up and turn red. "I... erm, I can't re.. remember." Why did they have to bring this up? I was already confused about my feelings for James! Wait, no I wasn't, what am I talking about?

"Hold on, I think it's coming back to me. Weren't you saying how you wished you had someone to love you and care for you, and what not?" Why is she doing this to me!

"Erm, I might have been." I glanced towards James, but he wasn't wearing the smug expression I was expecting him to wear, he was wearing one of sadness.

"Has it ever occurred to you, Lily, that you already have that?"

"I.. I do?" His expression was causing my heart to split in two, why did he look so miserable?

"Of course you do! That's what I'm here for." I was suddenly aware that everyone had fallen silent, and they were watching us, well me actually, for my reaction. Sirius glanced between the two of us, I was surprised to see that he looked slightly nervous, and cleared his throat.

"Would you look at that! This cloud looks exactly like a chocolate frog!" Everyone got the hint then, looking out of the window and talking loudly. But James and I continued to stare at each other, for how long I have no idea, but I felt myself becoming mesmerized by his big, warm hazel eyes. What was happening to me? I didn't have feelings for him, that was obvious, but there was something different about him, and there was something different about me. Every time I looked at him, I got this feeling in my stomach, something I had never felt before, and I _liked_ it. That was odd. Maybe they'd spiked the pumpkin juice.

"Lily?" I jumped and looked up. Everyone was staring at me.

"Yeah?"

"Are you all right?" Alice was looking at me, and it was obvious that she was starting to worry. But I wasn't sure why.

"Yeah... I'm fine. Why?" Why was everyone looking at me like there was something wrong with me?

"You just don't look very well, you're all pale and everything, and you look like you're about to faint."

Huh. "Really? I feel fine." James removed his eyes from the floor and examined my face. He looked worried.

"How much have you eaten today, Lily?" Seriously, what was with all the questions?

"Erm.." Now that I thought about it, I hadn't actually eaten anything. I hadn't been hungry when I woke up, it was too early to eat, and earlier, my hunger vanished for some strange reason. "A liquorice wand." It sounded more like a question.

"As if we believe that, it's right next to you, Lily." Damn it.

"Maybe that's why you feel ill. It's.." James looked at his watch, "it's nearly six in the evening and you haven't eaten anything."

"I don't feel ill! I'm just.. I'm saving myself for the feast." They all eyed me with sceptical expressions, but no one said anything else about it. I wasn't going to tell them that I wasn't hungry because every time I looked at a certain someone, I completely forgot everything else. I really needed to sort myself out. I do not like James Potter! Okay, I do like him, but not in that way. But then what is this strange feeling I get whenever I look at him, or whenever I hear his voice?

"I suppose we best change into our robes. We're nearly there." Sighing to myself, I grabbed my robes from my trunk and helped the girls force the marauders to leave the compartment so we could change.

.

"Another year of Hogwarts. To our new students, welcome, to our old students, welcome back! I would like to introduce our new Head Boy and Girl for this year, Lily Evans and James Potter!" The hall erupted in cheers as James pulled me to my feet. Blushing furiously, I shot him a death glare, which he only laughed at, and sat back down in my seat. Trying to ignore the chuckles from my friends, I turned my head towards the headmaster, who was calling for silence. "Yes, well, it looks as if you two are going to be splendid at being Head Boy and Head Girl. But enough of my rambling, lets eat!"

Before I could even take any of the food that had appeared on the table, James was piling a huge amount of it on my plate.

"What are you doing?"

"Making sure you eat something." I wish everyone would leave this whole food business alone, I mean, honestly, why are they making such a big deal out of it?

"Come on, Lily, I won't let you leave this hall until you eat something." I rolled my eyes and started to tuck in to my food. He smiled at me and then turned to his own plate.

Once everyone had finished eating, and I was feeling so full that I could burst, Dumbledore got to his feet again. "The very best of evenings to you!" he said, smiling broadly, his arms opened wide as though to embrace the whole room. "Another year full of magical education awaits you! Our caretaker, Mr Filch, has asked me to remind you that the forbidden forest is out of bounds to all students, and that anyone out of bed after curfew will face the consequences. Those wishing to play for their house Quidditch teams should give their names to their Heads of House as usual. We are also looking for new Quidditch commentators, who should do so likewise." The cheery smile on his face disappeared, and was replaced by a deadly serious expression. "Now, as everybody in this Hall knows, Lord Voldemort and his followers are at large and gaining strength." At these words, my stomach tied itself in a knot, and I looked at Snape. Everyone knew him and his Slytherin friends were aiming to become Death Eaters the moment they left Hogwarts. "I cannot empahsise strongly enough how dangerous the present situation is, and how much care each of us at Hogwarts must take to ensure that we remain safe. The castle's magical fortifications have been strengthened over the summer, we are protected in new and more powerful ways, but we must still guard scrupulously against carelessness on the part of any student or member of staff. I urge you, therefore, to abide by any security restrictions that your teachers might impose on you, however irksome you might find them – in particular, the rule that you are not to be out of bed after hours. I implore you, should you notice anything strange or suspicious within or outside the castle, to report it to a member of staff immediately. I trust you to conduct yourselves, always, with the utmost regard for your own and each other's safety." The Hall was absolutely silent. Everyone seemed to be taking in what Dumbledore had just said. James looked at me, and I looked right back at him, but for some reason, I could feel fear welling in my stomach. Soon, we would leave Hogwarts, we would be out in the wizarding world, fending for ourselves, soon, we wouldn't be under the protection of Albus Dumbledore, the only one that Voldemort ever feared. Soon, we would be alone, and vulnerable. Tearing my gaze away from James's face, I looked back at Dumbledore, who's blue eyes swept over us all before he smiled once more. "But now, your beds await, as warm and comfortable as you could possibly wish, and I know your top priority is to be well-rested for your lessons tomorrow. Let us therefore say goodnight. Pip pip!"

As I began to get to my feet, along with the rest of the school, McGonagall walked over to me and James.

"As you two are Head Boy and Girl, you will need to show the new Gryffindors to the common room, as well as showing them which dormitory they will be sleeping in. Then you are welcome to go to your new common room and dormitories, which you two will be sharing throughout this year. It is located on the sixth floor behind the portrait of Sir Cadagon. The password is 'responsibility'. And," her voice had now dropped to a whisper, "congratulations, you two. Both of the Heads are from Gryffindor house, I feel very proud of you both, and I dare say that you two will do a wonderful job." With one last look at the two of us, she strode off out of the hall. James sniggered.

"I think old Minnie's going soft!" I rolled my eyes and dragged him off to where the first years were waiting by the door.

.

"What floor did she say?"

"Six, James. You really should listen more." I turned my face towards him and gave him a mock look of disapproval.

"Hey! I do listen, I just don't always.. remember things."

"That much is obvious.." I mumbled, turning my head away from him.

He stopped walking. "What did you just say?"

"Nothing." Maybe my voice might have been a little too innocent, so maybe I did deserve what was coming next.

"Are you being sarcastic with me, Lily Evans?" He asked, taking out his wand. I eyed it sceptically.

"Me? Never, James Potter."

"Because if you are," he said, advancing on me, "I will have to take some action, to make sure it never happens again."

"Action?" I asked blankly, automatically taking a step back.

"That's right."

"And, erm.." I gulped, quite nervous now, "What exactly is this.. 'action'?"

"Well, I think I may have to just -"

"James!" My head whipped around as I heard that disgustingly sweet, innocent voice calling his name.

"Melissa?" She didn't reply, she just squealed and flung herself at him. Apparently, James wasn't expecting this, as not only did he not catch her, but the force at which she flew at him made him fall on the floor, Lydia landing right on top of him with an 'oomph'.

Melissa wasn't exactly the nicest kind of person. She was known for being overly flirtatious with anything in trousers. She had bleached blonde hair, ridiculously large eyelashes, which seemed to have a tendency to bat whenever she thought someone was looking at her, and seemed to wear the skimpiest clothes she could get away with. And these are just a few of the reasons why I absolutely hated her.

"Oooh, James," she purred, "You really do know how to please a woman. I thought maybe we could sneak off to a broom cupboard, but if you're that impatient that you want to stay here..." She trailed off, wiggling her eyebrows suggestively.

"I..." James stammered, going bright red in the face.

"I thought so." Was all she said, then she leaned in towards him, ignoring his attempts to get away from her.

"WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING?" I couldn't contain my anger, it just seemed to explode out of me. She pulled her mouth away from James, who was trying, unsuccessfully, to get away.

"What does it look like?" And with that, she hoisted her skirt up, revealing much more than I wanted to see, and launched herself back onto James. I was so angry that my vision seemed to be tinted with red. I stormed over to her, pulled her up by her hair, and pinned her against the wall.

"I suggest you leave him alone. It is not a wise idea to anger a red-head." And with that, I let go of her, causing her to fall to the floor, turned away from James, and practically ran down the corridor.

"Lily! LILY!" I could hear James calling me, but I just continued to run, I didn't want to face him now. I knew he wasn't far behind me, so when I reached the portrait of Sir Cadogan, I screamed the password at him and jumped inside.

I didn't stop to admire the obvious beauty of the room I was running through, I just ran until I reached the room that said 'Head Girl'. I threw myself inside and locked the door.

I don't know how long I sat there, ignoring James's words, muffled by my door. I only remember waking up, and deciding there and then that I had to avoid him. There was no way James and I could ever be together. He was popular, good looking, captain of the quidditch team. I was nothing like him. I had friends, but I wasn't exactly popular. I wasn't pretty, nor did I have anything that made people look up to me. Sure, I was Head Girl, but I was probably only made Head Girl because I spent the previous six years devoting myself to my studies, and Dumbledore probably just wanted someone who was sensible, so that they could drown out the prankster who had become Head Boy.

I got up and walked over to my mirror. What James Potter ever saw in me, I will never know. I pulled at a lock of my red hair, wishing that I could just be a blonde, or brunette, like any other girl. My pale skin repulsed me, it made me feel like I looked constantly ill. I had the bright, emerald eyes that went with every red head, despite the words of my friends, telling me that my eyes have that extra sparkle that others don't have, I still despise them. I used to be relatively skinny, until recently. I wasn't fat, I had just filled out, and quickly. I shot up through the bra sizes within months, (although not all of them, considering I am only a DD), my bum filled out so quickly that it is now covered in stretch marks, something that when I found out I had, I cried for hours, my thighs continue to grow, so that my size 6 jeans don't fit me like they used to. Sure, I can still get in them, but now I look forced, like I had to have help to get in them. All of these things just make me wonder what it is that makes James so attracted to me. If I was one of the pretty, popular girls, then I might be able to understand it, but I just can't. I'm not like him. He is strong, his muscles are visible, even through his clothing. He is no doubt the most good looking boy in the school. Sirius may be pretty close behind him, but James seems to always have a certain charm about him, a certain glow. He is the leader of the most popular group in the school; The Marauders. Everyone knows who they are, everyone loves them, everyone wants to be in with them. I must admit, they annoyed the hell out of me during my first five years at Hogwarts. But once I got to know them, I really enjoyed their company, and couldn't believe how different they were to what everyone thinks them to be. They're not cocky, they're not arrogant, and they are not bullies. And James Potter is the kindest, most sweetest, loyal person I have met in my life. Which is why he deserves better than me. And that is why I am going to avoid him.

A knock at my door startled me.

"Lily? Please can I come in? We need to talk." So I ran over to my bathroom, turned the shower on, and yelled back through my door: "No. I'm in the shower."

Okay, so I may have stayed in my room as late as I possibly could without being ridiculously late to my first lesson. I cracked open the door as little as possible, and when I saw that the common room was empty, I grabbed my bag and sprinted out of the room and out of the portrait hole.

On my way to Potions, which I was already dreading enough as it is, I had many false alarms. I squealed and hid behind suits of armour as armies of tall boys with jet black hair strolled past. After putting my wand away for the fourth time, I finally got to potions, albeit three minutes late.

Whilst saying sorry for being late to Professor Slughorn, I glanced around the room for a spare seat. There was just one at the front, next to... James Potter? Merlin, can I not get away from this boy? And why was he sitting on his own? I glanced behind me to double check that the rest of the Marauders were there, which they were.

"Ah, Miss Evans. Yes, you may have noticed that you will be sitting next to Mr Potter. Had to split him and Mr Snape up outside, and give them both the punishment of sitting nowhere near their friends. Although, Mr Potter may not actually find this a punishment, well, neither would Mr Snape, actually, shows just how lovely you are, Miss Lily! Now, come on," he clapped his large hands together, the sound echoing around the room, "chop chop!"

Sighing to myself, I sat down in the only empty seat and got my things out as Slughorn began to talk. I knew James was looking at me, but I wouldn't look at him, that would just start the conversation. A conversation that I really do not want to have, I might add.

"So, at the end of this hour, we should be seeing, from each of you, the perfect hiccoughing solution. You may start."

I flicked through my copy of _Advanced Potion Making_, searching for the right page. Scanning the list of ingredients, I realised I was missing beetle eyes, having left them in my dorm, after leaving in such a hurry. Slughorn wouldn't mind if I borrowed some out of the store cupboard.

As I was rummaging through the many boxes of potion supplies, I heard someone come up behind me. Grabbing the eyes as soon as I saw them, I turned around to get out of this snug little corner that I seemed to be trapped in, but froze when I turned.

"What do you want, Snape?" I could not deal with him right now. I had enough on my plate without having to deal with him wanting to be friends again.

"You know what I want. Don't be stupid, Lily. If you don't ignore what happened in the past, well, that would be a very stupid mistake."

I recoiled. "Are you _threatening_ me?" How _dare_ he! I don't want anything to do with him, he needs to grasp that, and leave me the hell alone, before I hex that ugly, hooked nose right off his face.

"If that will make you see sense, then, yes. Just don't turn into Potters little trophy, because he knows that you'll always belong to me, and he is just trying to steal you away-"

"Always belong to you? Who the hell do you think you are?" My voice was rising rapidly. "I'm not an object! I don't belong to anyone! And definitely not you! I hate you, I hate you so much you wouldn't believe. I don't want anything to do with you, ever. You need to get it into that stupid little head of yours that I hate you, and I do not belong to you, I never did, even when I could stand to be near that greasy mop that you call hair! You are a-"

"Now, now, what's happening here?" Slughorn bustled over, clearly trying to make sure everything was okay between his two favourite pupils.

"Nothing, Professor. Lily was just asking me where she could find the ingredients she needed."

"Ah, I see. Did you find them, Miss Evans?" He turned his gaze down to me, and his face was beaming. He was clearly hoping for a reunion between me and Snape. Fat chance.

"I already had them, sir. I was just about to leave when Snape came over and caused a disturbance. Now, if you'll excuse me.." I turned away from them both, back to my table, only to find James staring at me.

With a sigh, I sat back down, turned my back on him, and began to crush the beetle eyes with the side of my blade, maybe a bit more vehemently than I needed to.

"Are you all right, Lily?" I froze in my seat. He was talking to me. What do I do? If I start talking to him again, I'll just end up going back to how I used to feel around him,and then my plan won't work at all. I really needed some help with this. I made a mental note to myself to talk to Alice when I next saw her.

"I'm fine." I said, as bluntly as I could manage.

"Are you sure? What did Snape want? Was he being an idiot to you again? Did he threaten you? Because if he did,-"

"I said I'm fine, James." He fell silent. I tried my hardest to ignore the consuming guilt I felt at ignoring him, telling myself that I was doing it for his own good. But nothing worked. I had to stop myself many times from talking to him, I was going to fall back into the old routine soon if I didn't get a hold on myself.

When the lesson ended, I all but ran from the room. In my haste to get away from him, I ran into Bellatrix Black, not a good thing to do.

"Get away from me, you filthy little mudblood. My robes were clean on this morning, until your grubby little hands came into contact with them. You make me sick. But you'll get what's coming to you, believe me, you will."

I had endured those comments from her and her little gang of Death Eaters for seven years, and nothing had happened to me yet. As soon as she leaves Hogwarts, she'll end up in Azkaban, I can see it now. So I clearly have nothing to worry about.

History of Magic passed as quickly as it ever could. I sat at the back of the class today, making sure that I was away from James, Sirius and Remus. (Peter didn't receive the necessary OWLs to continue with this subject).

As the bell rang, I slowly gathered up my things and walked out of the room with Alice, filling her in on the things that had recently occurred.

"So basically, when you _finally_ start admitting to yourself that you fancy James Potter, you want to avoid him?"

"I do not fancy James Potter!" People in the close vicinity turned to look at me. I dropped my voice to a whisper. "I don't like him, not in that way, anyway. I just.. I feel that I need to avoid him, if you know what I mean?"

She looked at me, clearly confused. "What in the name of Merlin are you talking about, Lily?"

"Well, you know what I am, Alice. I can't be around people who I care for when I could be putting them in danger, you already know how many people have threatened me because I am a-"

She cut across me. "Please, _please_ tell me that you are not referring to the fact that you are muggle born?" She raised her eyebrows at me.

"Well... think about it logically, Alice! If I had my way, I wouldn't even be friends with you, but you won't let that happen, so.. but, seriously, we all know they're going to be after me as soon as I leave this place, and why would I want to put all of my friends in danger because of me? I just couldn't do that to hi-.. to all of you."

"When are you going to start to realise that we don't care? We're not going to abandon you because there may be danger ahead, if anything, we all want to fight them with you, not leave you on your own to do it." She nuged my side. "You really need to stop thinking like this, Lily. Just you wait until James hears about this."

"And why is he going to hear about this?"

"Probably because Sirius might have overheard us talking.."

"He WHAT!"

"Yeah, did you not see him just then, running around the corner?" She pointed to the end of the corridor. "Yeah, that was when he heard you raise your voice. He legged it then."

I sighed. I seemed to be doing that a lot lately. "Great."

.

I didn't want to go to the Great Hall. I'd already avoided James at lunch, saying that I had to visit Slughorn for something, but I couldn't do anything in my power to stop myself being dragged down to dinner.

"Look," Alice whispered in my ear, as she dragged me down the marble staircase, "If you do another disappearing act, I'll let Mary and Marlene know what's going on, and you know you won't be able to avoid anything with them in the know. So just think yourself lucky that I'm the only person who knows."

"I don't know why you're being so pushy. I didn't avoid James on purpose," Her expression told me she believed otherwise, "no, seriously, I didn't. I just, well, I didn't want to put myself in the path of temptation."

"Well, consider this me putting you in the path of temptation. Honestly, Lily, stop being such a drama queen."

I rolled my eyes and let her drag me towards the Great Hall. It was better for her if I didn't put up a fight. Instead, I let myself think of just how quickly these feelings had come on, I didn't think it was possible. If I would have known this time two days ago that I would be falling for James Potter, I would have gone to a doctor to make sure that I was still sane. It just doesn't make sense. How could feelings this strong come on in such a little amount of time? The only solution I could think of is that they have always been there, all along, they have just been very deep. But the only feelings I had ever felt for 'Big Head Potter' was hate. I just couldn't understand it. Unless someone had slipped me a love potion..

"... pathetic greasy slimeball. Who does he think he is? Stupid piece of-"

"Prongs, calm down. What have I told you before? Rise above it, become the bigger person. Just forget about him, all he wants is a fight."

"Yeah, and if he doesn't watch it, that's what he'll get."

"What's going on?" Alice asked, sitting down next to Remus. I slid in beside her.

"Nothing besides the ordinary. Snape antagonised James, and now James is all but raring to start a fight."

I sighed. "Seriously, James. You need to just ignore Snape. All he wants is attention, so why bother giving it to him?" I saw Alice smile at me, and I could tell she was pleased I wasn't making the situation as awkward as it could be.

Peter put down his knife and fork. Everyone stared at him. It was a rare occasion whenever Peter stopped eating. "She's right, Prongs. He's a Slytherin. Don't go to his level. Ignore him." He looked around, and must have noticed the shock on all of our faces. "What?"

Sirius laughed. "I can't remember the last time I saw you put down your knife and fork until your plate was empty and you literally couldn't eat any more." James chuckled in agreement. I hated how my heart fluttered at the sound.

"Well... actually, I'm thinking of going a diet..."

**So that's it, the first chapter. If you have time, please let me know what you think of it. Thanks again for reading.**


	2. Chapter 2

**So here's chapter two! I cannot express how grateful I am to those of you who reviewed, added this story to your favourites/story alerts, and for those who added me to their authour alerts, it really does mean so much to me, so thank you! **

**I don't know if I'm 100% happy with this chapter, to me it seems a bit dull, but I don't know whether I'm being too hard on myself. So if you could review and let me know what you think, that would be great. Thanks again for reading!**

**Disclamer: Once again, I do not own any of this.**

I couldn't get to him fast enough. I was running, running as fast as I possibly could, and yet it seemed to take me an age to move anywhere relatively close to him. I wouldn't get there in time, and for that, he would pay the price with his life.

My breath caught in my throat and I stopped in my tracks as I heard him scream out in pain. Snape watched from a distance, doubled over in laughter. The sight of him tainted my vision with red. He flicked his wand again, and that gave me the incentive to run again. I would not give up now, I couldn't.

"James!" I screamed. I knew it wouldn't do anything, make any difference. I was just praying that it would distract Snape long enough for me to be able to do something.

To my surprise, it worked. Snape looked up at me, distracted, and James's screams stopped. I ran faster, pulling my wand out of my pocket as I ran.

"What are you doing here?" He yelled. I ignored him. I didn't even look at him as I ran straight past him.

"I said, WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?" I didn't listen to what he was saying to me. I ran the last few feet to where James was laying, crumpled on the floor, bloody and vulnerable. I didn't notice when the voice of Severus Snape was no longer that.

I pulled James to his feet, looking around me for Sirius to help. Hadn't he been just behind me a second ago?

"No." I froze. I was too scared to turn around. Even in just that one word, I could tell who it was that was speaking. It was the thing that had haunted my nightmares since I was eleven years old, the thing that made me terrified whenever I was alone and feeling vulnerable. I didn't want to turn around to meet the red eyes that I knew would be there.

"Look at me, you coward."

"No."

"I said LOOK AT ME." I couldn't help it, it was as if gravity was pulling me towards him. I slammed my eyes shut. I couldn't look. But then again, I couldn't leave myself defenceless. I opened my eyes and pulled out my wand.

"Put it away, mudblood. You won't need it."

I ignored him, and followed the direction his wand was pointed at. It wasn't aimed at me, like I thought it would be.

"AVADA KE-"

.

"NO!"

I sat up, gasping. My eyes flew open and I saw that I was in my room. I put my head in my hands and felt that my face was covered in sweat. That dream had been so real, so vivid, and yet here I was, in my bed in Hogwarts. There had to be some explanation for what was happening to me. Within the past three days, James Potter has been all I'm able to think about, and it's not for the same reasons it used to be. Confused does not even cover it.

I glanced at the clock beside my bed and saw that it was just past seven in the morning. It was a Saturday and I had meant to lay in, but no way was I going to be able to get back to sleep.

I took my time getting ready, spending much longer than necessary in the shower. However I still managed to be ready by eight, even though I was fully dressed, hair dried, make up on. I knew that the one definite person who would be down at breakfast at this time was the one I needed to speak to.

.

"I need to talk to you." I said as I slid in beside him on the bench. I sighed as I piled scrambled egg onto my plate, knowing that this was a conversation I didn't want to have, but one that I knew I had to.

"Whoa, you sound serious."

"I am."

"What's wrong Lily?" I looked up at him, not knowing where to start.

"I think I'm falling for James." Sirius blinked in shock. The croissant in his hand fell back to his plate, emitting crumbs everywhere.

"What?"

"I think I'm falling for James." I repeated. I had expected his reaction.

"You're serious?" I had to try my hardest not to laugh and say "No, that's you!".

"Yes."

Then his face broke out into an ear splitting grin. "I knew it! All this time James has liked you and everyone kept telling him to give up, but not me, no, no, no. I knew you liked him, I knew it!"

I laughed. "Of course you did, Sirius."

"Wait, what are you doing here?"

I was confused. "What?"

"Why are you sitting here with me instead of being with James?"

Ah. "Well, I haven't told James."

"What!"

"I didn't know whether to tell him or not. So I figured I would come and speak to you, you're his best friend and you would know what is right." Sirius had to be of some help, surely. "But please don't tell him." I added.

"Lily, you know you really should tell him."

"But should I? Really? Think about it Sirius, I'm muggle born, he's a pure blood! You all are. Think how much danger I'd be putting you all in if something was to happen between me and James."

"That doesn't even count as an excuse. You can't use that. No one cares that you're a muggle born. To us, it doesn't matter. We're all the same." I knew he'd say something along those lines.

"All right then, say something was to happen between us. I wouldn't want to ruin our friendship. We've become quite close lately, not just me and James, but all of us. You marauders and us girls. Say me and James split up because it wasn't working, everyone would feel awkward around each other, people wouldn't know who's side to take, and that would effectively end our friendship. Me and James wouldn't be friends any more, me and you wouldn't, none of us would!"

"Lily, James would never let the two of you break up, you know that. He cares about you too much to let you go."

"But Sirius, you can't be sure. What if we did?"

"Well, if you did," He turned his attention back to his plate. "then I'd still be friends with both of you. We all would." He looked up at me again. "Honestly, how shallow do you think we are? Stop being such a pessimist."

I was about to argue, but he shoved a piece of toast in my mouth and ruffled my hair. Well, Sirius could only be serious for a limited amount of time at once.

"So," he said, moving his croissant to one side and piling on eggs and bacon, "When do you plan on telling him?"

I swallowed the mouthful of toast I had to make sure I could speak. "Honestly? I have no idea. I suppose whenever the right moment presents itself."

"So, maybe when you next see James?"

"I don't think quite that soon."

"Why not?" he said, glancing up at the doors to the Great Hall, "I think it'd be the perfect opportunity."

"Stop being so pushy. I'll tell him when it's the right-"

"Tell who what?"

I stopped talking immediately. I looked away from Sirius, who was silently shaking with laughter, to the person who had spoken, to the person who sat down next to me and was waiting for me to answer.

"Erm.." My mind went blank. I couldn't think what to say.

"Sirius, as Lily can't talk, you might as well explain." James turned to look at Sirius instead.

"Well, you see, Miss Lily here was just trying to decide when it would be the best time to tell.. Professor Slughorn that she will never be friends with Snape again."

James looked confused. "Oh, is that all? I thought it would be something much more serious."

Sirius and I looked at each other, and he gave me a look that said 'you owe me'.

We ate in silence for a while, while the hall around us got busier. Peter was the next to arrive, but he was too focused on the food to make conversation. I was about to leave, as I had a serious talk coming up with Alice, I needed to tell her Sirius knew, when James pulled me aside. I shot a frightened look at Sirius as James pulled me with him a few metres away from everyone, but he looked just as confused.

"Look, Lily. I know something's happened to make you act all.. weird around me, and I don't know what, but I want you to know, that I'm not going to push you on it, you can tell me in your own time, or not at all. But you know I'm here if you want to talk."

I couldn't think of anything to say. I was actually speechless.

.

As September turned to October, becoming increasingly colder as Halloween approached, the right moment still had not presented itself. Alice was growing more impatient by the day, but that was nothing compared to Sirius.

"Lily, pleaaaaasssseeeeee!"

"For the last time Sirius, no! Not yet, anyway."

"But why? Give me one good reason why." Alice, who had been chuckling to herself at Sirius's efforts, suddenly sat up straighter and eyed me suspiciously.

"Yes, I want to hear this," she said, giving me a scolding look that I felt I didn't deserve, "good luck worming your way out of this one!"

"Because..", I was searching my brain frantically, trying to come up with an excuse that didn't involve me being too much of a coward, "because I don't want to rush into anything."

They looked at each other, disgruntled, clearly disappointed in my answer. Sirius raised an eyebrow at me, which made it obvious he was thinking something along the lines of 'is that the best you can do?'

"No, it's the truth! Look," I put aside my unfinished transfiguration essay and my quill, "I don't want to ruin things between us. So either you let me do things my way, or I never tell him at all."

Alice's eyes turned to slits. "You know what Lily, sometimes you can be such a-"

"Lily! I've been looking for you everywhere. How come you're in Gryffindor common room rather than ours?"

"Because, odd as this may sound James, I do like to spend time with my friends every now and then.."

"Yeah, she, unlike somebody I know, hasn't forgotten about her friends!" I burst out laughing at the put out expression on Sirius's face.

"Oh stop sulking, Padfoot," said James, picking up an empty ink bottle and throwing it at Sirius's head, "just because we don't share a dormitory any more doesn't mean you never see me! Anyway, Lily, there was a reason I needed to talk to you. I ran into McGonagall a minute ago, and she decided only just now to tell me, two weeks from Halloween, that her and Dumbledore think it would be a good idea to throw a Halloween party for fourth years and above, to 'keep up morale and to let the students forget what is happening outside Hogwarts'."

"Two weeks for people to sort out dresses and dates and everything? They sure are cutting it a bit fine." I was clearly not secretly hoping that James would ask me to be his date.

"Oh no, it gets worse. She wants us to organise it."

"What? In two weeks? Please tell me you're joking?"

"Afraid not."

"This is going to be impossible."

"I couldn't agree more."

Out of the corner of my eye I saw Alice and Sirius exchange a mischievous look.

"Well," said Sirius, standing up and walking over to me and James, "looks like you two will need to spend a lot of time _alone_ together organising this. No time to waste, off you go!" And with that he shoved us both towards the portrait hole with a smirk and a wave. Shaking my head at his useless attempt at being subtle, I followed James out of the portrait hole.

I shut my eyes and let my head fall onto the palm of my hand. "This is going to be a nightmare." I grumbled.

James chuckled. "I know. I don't even know where to start."

"We'll need to let everyone know, that's the first priority. Should we ask Dumbledore to make an announcement at dinner?"

James ran a hand through his hair. I remember when this used to irritate me to no end, but now, however, I couldn't stop staring as he did it. I couldn't get over how... _sexy _it was. Oh lord help me. "Yeah, that's probably the best way to do it."

"Do you think it ought to have a theme? Like fancy dress or something?"

"I don't know.. I think fancy dress could be fun, but I think the girls would prefer it if it was more a ball than a party, they never turn down the opportunity to get all glammed up do they?"

"Yeah, you're right. So a ball on Halloween night in the Great Hall at eight. How does that sound?"

"Sounds perfect."

.

So organising the ball hadn't actually been that bad. Every evening James and I would sit in our common room finalising our plans. Dumbledore had let the school know the following evening at dinner, resulting in a huge excitement, mainly from the girls, that had spread around the school and was all people were able to talk about. Of course, not everyone was excited. I was on my way to charms with James when we walked past an incredibly upset third year, who was sulking to her friend.

"It's so unfair. Why aren't we allowed to go? I had the perfect dress picked out, and I was hoping that Timothy could ask me to be his date and..."

James snorted at her. "Don't be unkind," I reprimanded him, "I do feel sorry for them. Remember when we were in second year and there was a ball, I was most upset that I couldn't go."

"It wasn't even very good, you didn't miss out on much."

I raised my eyebrows at him. "You're talking like you were there."

He chuckled. "Well all years below fourth were forbidden to go... so naturally, we went."

"Why does that not surprise me." I muttered.

We got to charms and I waved bye to James as I went to take my usual seat with Alice, Mary and Marlene. It wasn't difficult to guess what they were talking about.

"Two days... I can't believe it's two days away!"

"I know, I haven't even decided what to do with my hair yet.. Mary will you help me please?" Alice was panicking, God knows why.

"Of course I will. Lily!" She shouted as I sat down. "Guess who Marlene's going with!"

"Who?"

"Amos Diggory!" I looked over at Marlene, who was a brilliant shade of red.

"Really? When did he ask you?"

"Just now, before charms." She sounded relieved; we all knew she'd liked him for ages.

"So, Lily," Alice started, "that just leaves you without a date. Mary's going with Richard Brown from Ravenclaw, I'm going with Frank, and you're going with...?"

I shot daggers at her. "Yes, that's right, I'm not going with anyone. Let's all laugh at my expense shall we!" I said sarcastically.

"But it's not that no one has asked you. We know for a fact that you have had at least three offers, but, for some reason, you turned them all down."

"Are you secretly hoping that James will ask you?" Mary asked, winking at me.

I leapt up. "NO! Where on earth did you get that idea? ALICE I WILL KILL YOU." The class had gone silent so I quickly sat back down and hid my face behind my book. Why had I just overreacted like that? This whole James thing was messing with my head.

"Calm down Lily. Alice hasn't told us anything, although now we know there is something we need to know." She pulled my book away and slammed it on the table. "Spill."

I knew there was no getting out of it, I was going to have to tell them. Plus it didn't really seem fair that Alice and Sirius knew but Marlene and Mary didn't.

"I like James." I mumbled almost inaudibly.

"What?"

I sighed. "I like James." The only reaction they were permitted was a gasp, before Flitwick called the class to order.

I spent the whole of the class ignoring the nudges and pokes I was getting either side from Mary and Marlene. I was preparing myself for the onslaught that would come whilst we were walking to lunch.

"...two scrolls of parchment on my desk next lesson. You may go."

I kept my head down while I put my stuff away. I was regretting telling them, they would never let this go. I could literally feel the impatience coming off them while I was taking my time.

"Lily come on, you're killing us here!"

"Fine. I'm ready. Lets go."

"How long? How long have you liked him for?"

"Erm-"

"Lily, can I talk to you for a moment?" I looked up and saw James standing next to me, looking incredibly nervous.

"Yeah, sure." I said, with a glance in the girl's direction. They were practically wetting themselves with excitement.

He led me over to a deserted corridor while everyone else made their way to lunch. He couldn't seem to keep his hand from his hair and his eyes were glued to the floor.

"Are you okay?"

"What?" He said, looking up. "Oh, yeah, I'm fine... I just wanted to ask you something."

"Go ahead."

"Well, erm..." he cleared his throat, "I was wondering if you, erm, had a date to the ball?"

I tried to keep my face the same and ignore the fireworks that were exploding in my stomach.

"No, I don't."

He looked slightly more hopeful. "Well, did you maybe, only if you want to, go with me? I mean if you don't want to that's fine, you won't hurt my feelings or anything, but I just thought that seeing as-"

"James, stop babbling."

"Sorry. So, did you want to come with me?"

I tried to make my voice as calm as possible, and pretended to deliberate my answer. "Yeah, sure. I'd love to."

He perked up instantly. "You would?"

I smiled. "Yeah, why not?"

"Okay then. I'll pick you up in the Entrance Hall at eight on Friday, yeah?"

"Yep, sounds good." No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't keep the stupid grin off my face, and neither, it seemed, could he.

.

News that I, Lily Evans, was going to the Halloween Ball with James Potter, had spread incredibly fast, even for Hogwarts standards. Everyone in the entire school seemed to know before James and I even left the Great Hall after lunch.

Of course, Alice, Marlene and Mary were absolutely thrilled. They wouldn't shut up about it, even on the morning of the ball it was still the hot topic of discussion. I'd learned to just tune them out and nod along every now and then, too nervous about what was going to happen tonight to try and listen to them.

Not everyone was entirely thrilled, though. I had an unfortunate encounter with Melissa Hicks yesterday afternoon, and, because of the volume of her shrill voice and the coldness in it, we seemed to have an argument in front of the entire population of Hogwarts, including some of the teachers.

"You're just stringing him along because you love the attention!" She screamed at me.

"Yes," I replied, my voice dripping with sarcasm, "that's exactly what it is."

"It's true! You won't let him move on because you're too focused on yourself to care about him! I still don't get why he'd even like a bitch like you, but just let him go!"

"Whatever, Melissa. I don't have to listen to this." I started to walk away, but she ran after me and roughly grabbed my wrist.

"Don't walk away like the coward you are, I want to sort this out once and for all. Me and James were getting along just fine, I like him and he likes me, but you don't want him liking anyone else, do you? DO YOU?"

I laughed. "James likes you? Is that why he asked me to the ball instead of you, is it?"

She spluttered and turned red. "We decided it would be better if we went separately, not that it's any of your business."

"Of course you did." I didn't mean to sound so patronising and bitchy, but this girl was really starting to piss me off.

"Oh stop acting so smug Lily, you're clearly just jealous of me!"

I stood in shock, my eyebrows raised, trying to establish whether I had heard her correctly. "Jealous of you?"

"Yes."

"And why on earth would I be jealous of you?"

"Because," she snarled, "I'm everything that you're not!" I laughed again. "I'm prettier than you, a lot prettier than you, I'm popular, people actually like me, including James, and, for one thing, I'M NOT PALE AND GINGER!"

I couldn't hold it in any longer, I burst out laughing, tears streaming from my eyes. "No," I said, trying desperately to control myself, "you're not pale and ginger, well done. You are a delusional, dizzy, stuck up, selfish whore who seems to think the whole world revolves around her. Just grow up Melissa, and I will be ready to accept your apology when you are mature enough to give it to me. Now, if you'll excuse me," I said, picking up my bag, "I need to get back to my common room, you know, the one I share with James."

The marauders had been thoroughly impressed with my argument, and I had to sit with them and listen while they described it detail by detail.

"You know," Sirus had said, leaning back on his chair, "it's so much better observing one of Lily's moods, rather than being on the receiving end one."

"Couldn't agree with you more, Padfoot. That girl used to absolutely terrify me once she got started."

"Used to?" I said, turning on James, "You mean you aren't scared of me any more?" I narrowed my eyes at him and drew out my wand.

He gulped. "No, no I take it back, I am. I'm terrified."

"Good, you best be."

"Oh, I am." He winked at me. Causing me to turn bright red and suddenly remember that I 'had to rush off to meet Alice'.

.

I was sitting next to Marlene at breakfast, enjoying all the usual Halloween decorations; the live bats, the giant pumpkins, the eerie fog, when a screech owl landed right in front of me, a letter tied to it's leg.

"Who're you after?" I asked it, while stroking its beak. It nipped my finger affectionately. Frowning, I took the piece of parchment from its leg and saw it was addressed to me. How odd, no one ever writes to me.

"Who's that from, Lily?" Mary asked, leaning over Peter to talk to me.

"No idea." I unrolled the parchment and smoothed it out. It was Petunia's handwriting.

_Lily,_

_Vernon and I are getting married on January 18th. When mum saw the invitation list and saw that you were not invited, she went ballistic and we had a massive argument. Of course I don't want you there, why would I? But, not only did mum insist on you coming, she also insisted on you being a bridesmaid. It's like she's trying to make my wedding a horrible occasion. I do not want you to be my bridesmaid, so you have mum to thank for that. Anyway, seeing as you're away at your freak school and have no way of getting back home, I'm having to order your dress without you trying it on or seeing it, so if it doesn't fit, deal with it. You look like you've got chubby anyway so I'm sure it's more likely to be too small than anything. Maybe I should just order you a bigger size just in case. And you're fine with a pink dress aren't you? I thought it would look absolutely smashing with that hair of yours._

_I won't see you until the rehearsals for my wedding, mum can tell you when they are, as I'll be staying with Vernon because you'll be at home._

_I'm warning you, Lily. This is my special day and if you ruin it, if you do any of your stupid hocus pocus then it will be the last time I ever speak to you, and I mean it. To me, we are no longer sisters, but if you ruin this for me then I will forget that I ever knew you._

_Don't respond to this, I only wrote to you in the first place because mum made me. I wouldn't want you thinking it was okay to write back to me._

_Petunia._

I put down the letter and put my head in my hands, sighing. I really wish Petunia didn't hate me so much. I don't think she realises just how much her words hurt me.

"What's wrong, Lily?" I looked up to find everyone looking at me. Without a word I handed the letter to Alice, who read it out to everyone. I picked up a piece of toast and started buttering it, making myself concentrate on doing that rather than seeing my friends reactions to the horrible words in the letter.

"'Maybe I should just order you a bigger size just in case?' Who on earth does she think she is? Has she looked at you lately? You have the perfect figure!"

"Ugh, she knows that pink does not match your hair at all. She's just trying to make sure that you don't look as great as you could."

"To me, we are no longer sisters? She needs to get off her high horse and have a good slap around the face. Lily, can I come to the wedding with you so that I can say something to her?"

"She wasn't even going to invite you? That son of a-"

"Don't worry about it," I said, cutting everyone off as they all started commenting at once, "really, it's not a big deal."

"Not a big deal?", James looked angry, "Lily, she's your sister, she has no right to talk to you like that!"

"Well nothing I say to her will change it, so I'm just going to have to try and not let it get to me." It really did mean a lot to me that they all cared this much.

"Evans, me and Prongs are coming to this wedding with you. Prongs can take care of your bitch of a sister, while I deal with her whale of a boyfriend, from what you've said about him, he sounds just as bad as her." If I hadn't of been so upset, I would have found the look on Sirius's face incredibly amusing.

I forced a laugh. "Really, I'll be fine. I've got another three months until I have to think about it again. So lets please just forget about it and focus on tonight."

Everyone apart from Marlene was prepared to drop it. She, apparently, was still fuming about me being called chubby.

"I just don't understand how she can justify telling you you've put weight on! Is she blind, Lily? I just want to curse her, this has made me so angry!" The rest of us didn't respond, there was nothing we could say to calm Marlene down; once she got started, it was very difficult to try and stop her. It was so bad, that she continued her monologue all the way down to potions.

.

"Excellent, very good work today, from everyone!" Slughorn boomed, his chubby face shining with delight. "The perfect shrinking solution was produced from everyone, I am very impressed. You know what this means, no homework! Go on then, off you go."

"That has to be the first ever time I have not been given extra potions homework!" James exclaimed, lifting his cauldron back into his bag.

"Surely you can't be that bad at potions. You've been fine this year haven't you?"

"Yes, Lily, but look who I'm sitting next to! You're top in the class and you help me without even meaning to..."

"Oh, Miss Lily! A quick word if you may. And you, Mr Potter." Slughorn raised his hand and beckoned us towards him. I picked up my bag and followed James over.

"Professor McGonogall would like to see you both in her office, she said it's urgent. So head there instead of going to Herbology. Run along then!"

"What do you think McGonogall wants?" James asked, as the dungeon door swung shut behind him.

"No idea. You haven't pulled anymore pranks or anything lately, have you?"

"Oh that's right, just jump to the conclusion that I've done something 'irresponsible'!" He was chuckling, and gave my shoulder a playful shove, causing me, again, to flush bright red and try to ignore the electric current now surging through my body from where he touched me.

"Well," I said, trying to get a grip on myself, "it wouldn't be the first time, would it?"

He gasped and grabbed his heart. "That hurt, Lily, that really hurt."

I laughed as he pouted. "Oh, I'm sure you'll get over it."

We seemed to get to McGonogall's office straight away, the journey that normally takes a good ten minutes seemed to have been over as soon as it started. I realised, with a jolt in my stomach, that whenever I was with James, the time always went incredibly quickly.

We exchanged a look before James knocked on the door. Why did she need to see us so urgently?

"Come in." I followed James into her office. "Ah," she said, standing up, "yes, Potter, Evans, take a seat."

I shared another wary look with James before taking the seat closest to the door.

"I unfortunately have some bad news to share with you. The band for tonight, 'Deathcap Maestros'" she wrinkled her nose in disapproval at the name, "have had to cancel."

"What?" I shouted.

"The lead singer has been sentenced to Azkaban, after being found to have been helping the Death Eater's in torturing innocent muggles." James swore under his breath.

"Great. Well that's just great!" He exclaimed.

"What are we supposed to do now? Proffesor?" I added hastily, seeing McGonogall's nostrils starting to flare.

"You have two options. You either try and find a replacement today that is able to perform tonight, or you postpone the ball."

"Postpone it? Everyone's been looking forward to it for two weeks, we would be the most hated people in the school if we postponed it."

"Well, unless you can find another replacement in-" she checked her watch, "nine and a half hours, Miss Evans, postponing it is your only other option."

"We'll do it. We'll find a replacement by tonight, Proffesor."

"Very well, Mr Potter. You are both excused from lessons today whilst you try to find another band to perform."

.

"This is impossible!" I groaned, letting my head fall onto the table.

"Well," Sirius said, taking a seat on the bench opposite me, "if you'd have accepted my services, then you would not find yourselves in this predicament."

I rolled my eyes. "Sirius, I would rather have the Giant Squid perform instead of having to listen to you singing all night."

"You can be so harsh sometimes, Evans."

I was about to respond, when I was interrupted with James shouting down my ear.

"I've got it! Celestina Warbeck!"

"What about her?"

"She's staying in Hogsmede at the moment! Madam Rosmerta told me, she's at the Three Broomsticks."

"What, do you think we should ask her to perform tonight?"

"Yes!"

"Do you think she'd do it?"

"Only one way to find out, isn't there?"

"But how are we supposed to ask her? Its not a Hogsmede weekend..."

The Marauder's burst out laughing. I looked around at them all, confused. Finally, my gaze settled on James, who was trying as hard as he could to control his laughter.

"What's so funny?" All I had said was it wasn't a Hogsmede weekend...

"Lily, do you really think, when it comes to the Marauder's, that it matters whether it's a Hogsmede weekend or not?"

"Probably not, no."

"Precisely. Padfoot, do you still have the map?"

"Yeah, I'll run up and get it. Meet you at the witch?"

"Okay. Ten minutes, Padfoot!" James yelled as Sirius sprinted out of the Great Hall.

"Moony, do you still have the cloak?"

Remus pulled his bag off the floor and rooted through it, evidently looking for something. He pulled out a silvery looking cloak, and handed it to James, who thrust it into his bag.

"Thanks!" Said James, standing up and pulling me up with him.

"See you later, Prongs. Good luck with Celestina!"

"James, what on earth is going on?" I asked, as I followed him out of the Great Hall and up the marble staircase.

"We're going to the Three Broomsticks to try and talk to Celestina Warbeck."

"I'm not even going to ask how we're going to get there."

"Spoken like the true friend of a Marauder." He winked at me.

"How long do you think it will take us to get there, convince her, then get back? We've only got seven hours left.."

"Probably an hour or two at the most. I can be persuasive when I want to be, so once I turn my charm on, she'll agree like that." He clicked his fingers.

I snorted. "Yeah, of course."

He raised his eyebrows. "What, you don't think she'll succumb to my powers so easily?"

"Nope." I smirked.

"Lily Evans, you are about to be proved wrong. No woman can turn me down!"

"Are you sure about that? I did!"

"That might be true, but who are you going to the ball with tonight?"

Oh damn, he had me. "You." I mumbled.

He cupped his hand around his ear. "What was that now? Didn't quite catch that."

"YOU!"

"That's what I thought."

.

"Would you look at that.. James Potter, I thought you'd forgotten all about me!" Madam Rosmerta came forwards from behind the bar of the Three Broomsticks, and eyed James with a mockingly severe look.

"Don't be silly, how could I ever forget about you?" He winked at her. Seeing James wink at another woman made my stomach squirm.

"Well, you and Sirius haven't come to visit me like you usually do."

"We couldn't be more apologetic."

"Good. What will it be then, James, the usual?"

"Afraid not, here on Hogwarts business, you see."

"Really?"

"Yes. Lily and I were wondering if it was possible for us to speak to Celistina Warbeck?"

She glanced at me and then back at James, evidently confused.

"Why?"

"Because," James lowered his voice, "we are in need of a singer for the Halloween ball at Hogwarts tonight, as the last one was arrested."

"Oh my.. well, all right then, but just because it's you. She's up here." We followed Madam Rosmerta behind the bar and up a small staircase, which emerged onto a large landing, with at least a dozen doors leading off it. She lead us to the door furthest away from the staircase.

"Madam Warbeck?" She asked, knocking on the door, "Is this a convenient time? You have visitors."

"It's fine," a sing song voice replied, "come in."

Madam Rosmerta opened the door for us and gestured for us to enter, once we were in, she closed the door behind us and left.

"How may I help you?" I turned away from the door and towards the sound of the voice. Celistina was very pretty; she had long, blonde, wavy hair that reached the middle of her back, startling blue eyes, a kind smile, a figure that nearly every woman would be jealous of and envy, she was curvy but it suited her. She looked like she was in her thirties.

I was thankful that James spoke, I had no clue what to say to the woman.

"I'm James Potter, and this," he gestured towards me, "is Lily Evans. We're Head Boy and Girl from Hogwarts. We've organised a Halloween ball for tonight, but, unfortunately, our band have had to cancel at very late notice."

"And you were wondering if I would step in and perform for you?" She was smiling at us, looking perfectly at ease.

"Yes, that was our general idea." I fought to stop myself from laughing; James wasn't lying when he said about turning his charm on, he was being so... _smooth._

"Well, as much as I would like to sit here and make you beg me, all for my own amusement," she winked at James, "However, I am all too eager to return to Hogwarts, so my answer is, as you can probably guess, yes."

My face lit up at the exact same time James's did. All that worrying had been for nothing, I could get back to the castle and get ready for an entire night in James's company. I didn't even try to keep the smile off my face.

"Thank you so much, Miss Warbeck." I said.

"Oh, please," she waved a hand in dismissal, "it's nothing, really. And do call me Celistina. No, it'll be a pleasure. I have many fond memories of Hogwarts. I used to be a prefect you know, although I highly believe the reason I wasn't made head girl was most likely because I was caught most too often in a broom cupboard when I was supposed to be doing my rounds." She giggled.

After sorting out all the arrangements, I stood up with James to leave, seeing as it was three o'clock, and I really needed to be getting ready.

"Thanks again, Celistina. We'll see you tonight!"

"It's no trouble at all. And I must say, you two do make such a lovely couple!"

I felt myself turning bright red. "Oh. Erm-"

"We're not a couple." James spoke incredibly bluntly. I looked away from him, so he couldn't see my shocked expression.

"Well, I'm sorry I jumped to conclusions.. See you tonight."

We left the Three Broomsticks and made our way back to Hogwarts. The only thing that was on my mind was how quickly James had dismissed the fact that we were a couple. I didn't understand why he said it with such force, and I couldn't believe how much it had hurt me.

I was glad it was windy on the way back, that way I had an excuse for the uncontrollable tears sliding down my cheeks.

**I'm really looking forward to writing the next chapter, the ball. Hopefully it won't be too long before it's updated. Thanks again for reading!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Authors note:**

**I am very sorry for making you wait longer for an update, I just wasn't happy with this chapter and didn't want to post it until I was. Also, I've been really busy lately, I know that's no excuse, but please forgive me!**

**I just want to say thank you to my reviewers: iAmy, lolly, Jezzi1996, crazymacky and liz. Also a big thank you to everyone who has added this to their story alerts/favourites, I really didn't expect so many of you to do so.**

**Anyway, enough rambling, here's chapter three!**

**.**

"What a twat."

"Marlene!"

"What, Lily? It's true. He's loved you for how many years now? Then when you finally agree to go to the ball with him, he has to go and complicate things by making you have no clue how he feels. Don't get me wrong, I like James, but he can sometimes be an absolute idiot."

"Yeah, well," I said, pulling my towel tighter around myself, I had just got out of the shower, as I sat down at my dressing table, "it now makes me think that I shouldn't tell him how I feel."

"Lily, just forget about all this and focus on getting yourself ready. Just make sure you look absolutely stunning and beautiful, then worry about James." I looked over at Alice, who was laying on my bed while Mary was painting her toenails for her. The girls were all going to get ready here, so we had my room and the common room, and James's room if we wanted it, to ourselves, while James went back to Gryffindor common.

"Yeah, I will-" I was interrupted by what sounded like a knock on the portrait hole. Wrapping my towel even more firmly around myself, I left my room to go see what it was.

"Remus?" I asked, as I pulled open Sir Cadagon's portrait.

"Hi, Lily, sorry to bother you." I stood aside so he could climb through into the common room.

"Is everything okay?"

"Yeah, it's fine. Sirius thought it would be funny to tell me the password was a rather rude swear word, which I now know it isn't."

I rolled my eyes. "Typical Sirius."

"Yep. Anyway, I'm just here to pick up James's clothes, he said he left them here."

"Why couldn't James come and get them himself?"

"Because you were here." I felt my stomach drop and my heart break.

"What?"

Remus obviously saw how hurt I was and amended his story. "Oh! No, no, not like that. He meant you were here getting ready, and obviously he's going with you, so he didn't want to spoil the surprise and everything. Honestly, that's all." He made his way into James's room, calling over his shoulder, "Bloody hell, it's a mess in here." He came out a few seconds later with a bag which obviously contained James's clothes.

"Does it really surprise you? A seventeen year old boy having a room to himself and no one to look after him?"

"Well, he does have the house elves.."

"Nope, he told them not to worry about it as he wanted to look after himself."

"That boy can be such an idiot sometimes!" This reminded me exactly of what Marlene said moments earlier. "Oh," Remus said, digging around in his pocket, "he also asked me to give you this." He handed me a folded up piece of parchment. "See you at the ball, Lily."

I wandered back into my room, opening up the parchment as I went. It was from James.

_Lily,_

_I would have come and got my clothes myself, but I thought you would rather not have me in your hair while you and the girls were getting ready, so please don't think I'm avoiding you._

_I know I only saw you an hour ago, but I forgot to finalise the arrangements for tonight. I'll pick you up in the entrance hall at eight, so if you aim to be ready for half past seven, then you shouldn't be too late. _

_Dumbledore's meeting Celistina at quarter to eight, so hopefully all of that will run smoothly. Although I may need your help in restraining Peter from running onto the stage and either declaring his love for her, he seems to have developed quite a crush on her, or from trying to serenade her in song. Neither of those would be very pretty to see or hear._

_I look forward to seeing you soon, when you will be MY date (even though apparently, according to you, no woman will succumb to my charm, so you must be going as my date for some completely unheard of reason)._

_Love James._

It was a completely pointless letter, but it still managed to make my heart flutter.

"Lily, stop grinning like an idiot and come over here and paint my nails." Mary demanded.

"Sorry." I chuckled, as I headed to where Mary was lying on the floor next to the bathroom.

.

We took our time getting ready. And I mean really took our time. It was six o'clock before we all decided we were hungry, and, as we were all still doing our hair, we managed to rope Frank in to going down to the kitchens and getting us some food, while Alice hid behind the bathroom door the whole time.

At five to eight, we all put on our dresses and stood in front of my mirror admiring ourselves.

I wasn't being vain, but I _felt _pretty. I felt like I looked pretty, and that made me feel good in myself. All in all, I was actually quite pleased with how well everything had turned out. I'd curled my hair, using a very handy spell that Mary had taught me in fourth year, but brushed it through so that the curls hung loosely. I pinned all of my hair to the right side of my head so that it sat just below my right breast. I had kept my make up relatively simple, but applied more than I wore on a daily bases. My eyes looked natural, except for the slight flicks of eye liner I'd applied to the corner of my eyes, and I'd applied a dark grey eye shadow to my lids, giving them a slightly smoky effect. I'd kept the rest of my face simple, adding slightly more blusher than usual and using a clear lip-gloss on my lips, so that they slightly shimmered. My dress however, was the thing I loved the most. I'd seen it on the Hogsemede weekend, which was a week ago, and knew that it was just perfect. It was an emerald colour, which matched my eyes perfectly. It had two straps that covered my shoulders, then went into a v-neck at my chest. It came in at my waist, making me look quite slim, and then flowed straight down to my feet, so that it glided across the floor every time I walked. It was made out of silk, but the stiffer kind of silk.

"Girls, we all look gorgeous!" I laughed at Marlene's boldness.

"Yeah," Mary agreed, "those guys are damn lucky to have us as their dates."

She's right, we did all look good. Alice was wearing a dark navy dress that went beautifully with her pale skin, Marlene was wearing dark purple dress that really suited her curvy figure, and Mary was wearing a shockingly bright red dress that looked stunning with her blonde hair.

"Are we all ready then?" I asked. It was eight o'clock, and we were all meeting our dates in the Entrance Hall at eight. Marlene had insisted on being 'fashionably late' in order to make the boys sweat.

My nerves increased the whole way down to meet James. I was in the middle of taking long, deep, calming breaths when Alice nudged me.

"Are you okay?" She asked in a quiet voice.

"I'm just nervous."

"You've got no need to be. Or is tonight the night you're planning on telling him how you feel?"

"I really don't know. I'm trying not to think about that, Alice."

"Well," Alice said, as we approached the top of the marble staircase, "I think you should." She spotted Frank, and turned to hug me goodbye. "Just think about it." She whispered in my ear. And then she was gone. I looked around for Mary and Marlene, but they'd both disappeared as well. Great. I'd have to do this by myself then.

I glanced around as I started to descend the staircase. That's when I saw him. He looked perfect. He was leaning against the wall, one hand running through his hair, talking to Sirius. He wasn't wearing dress robes; he was wearing a suit. A black suit that fitted him perfectly, he couldn't have looked better if he tried. My heart stopped in my chest as he looked up and saw me, and I couldn't hide the satisfaction I got when I saw his jaw drop. He said something to Sirius and made his way towards me, and I met him at the bottom of the staircase.

"Hi." I said, smiling at him.

"Lily, you're stunning."

I tried to stop the blush that was creeping onto my cheeks. "You're not bad yourself, you know."

"I mean it, Lily," he said, taking another step towards me so he could lean down and whisper in my ear, "you're truly beautiful."

Suddenly wasting the whole afternoon getting ready was completely worth it.

"I don't want to spend the night arguing, so I'll just say thank you and politely agree."

He rolled his eyes at me and offered me his arm. "Want to go in and see if all of our hard work has paid off?"

"Yes, yes I do." I said, putting my arm through his. We made our way into the Great Hall, where the four house tables had been removed and where the teachers table normally stood was a giant stage. It looked amazing. An eerie fog was looming just underneath the enchanted ceiling, so you could just make out the stars twinkling through, round tables had been put at the sides of the room, with pumpkins for chairs, but instead of looking tacky, it looked wonderful.

We made our way over to one of the tables on the right side of the hall, where we sat down with Alice and Frank, who seemed to only have eyes for each other, Remus and Doris Flume, a sixth year girl from Ravenclaw, Peter and a terrified looking third year Hufflepuff, who's name I didn't know, Sirius and Dorcas Meadows, a seventh year Ravenclaw, Mary and Richard Brown from Ravenclaw, and Marlene and Amos Diggory from Hufflepuff.

"This place looks really good!" Mary exclaimed as we sat down, "Seriously, you should be proud!"

"Yeah, I didn't expect it to look this good. And, if I'm honest, I'm glad the pumpkin chairs worked out, I really thought they were going to look stupid."

"Hey!" James turned on me. "Lily, they were my idea!"

"That's why I didn't think they would work out." I muttered. Sirius snorted into his firewhisky. "Sirius! Where did you get that from?"

"I simply found it laying on the table, and it clearly was meant to be drunk. I thought you had so kindly left it for me, Lilyflower."

"You know full well I didn't."

"Oh, well no harm in drinking it now, is there?"

"I suppose not."

"That's the spirit!"

I laughed as he downed his goblet in one.

"Where's the music?" Peter squeaked. I mean, I know he's James's friend, but there's something about Peter that I can't quite put my finger on.

"Patience, my friend, patience." I looked at James, who pointed towards the stage. Dumbledore was standing on it, calling for everyone's attention.

"A very good evening to you all! I do not want to impose on this very wonderful night you all intend to have, so let me jump straight to the point. I think everyone ought to put there hands together and applaud our Head Boy and Head Girl, without whom, none of this would have been possible." The hall erupted in cheers, although not everyone seemed to pleased; a couple of tables away, a group of girls were shooting daggers at me, evidently upset that I was James's date. "And now," he said, calling for silence once more, "it is time for me to introduce your entertainment for the evening. I give you Celistina Warbeck!" Everyone was on their feet, clapping and screaming as Celistina came on stage.

"Well," I said, as the hall quietened down while Celistina began her first song, "I don't want to jinx it or anything, but it seems like everything's gone to plan!"

"Were you doubting our amazing party planning talents?"

"To be honest, James, yes. Weren't you?"

He leaned back in his chair. "Nope," he said, with a sigh, "I'm brilliant at everything, this being no exception."

I laughed and slapped his shoulder.

"Dorcas, my darling, fancy a dance?" Sirius was wiggling his eyebrows at his date.

She didn't melt like every other girl would have. She merely shrugged, took his outstretched hand and said, "Sure, why not?" and they disappeared into the throng of people on the dance floor.

.

I couldn't believe how much I was enjoying myself. I spent the first part of the night sat our table, talking and forgetting everything else that was going on. Every now and then I would look at James and feel the desire to hold his hand or bring my chair closer to his, but I resisted.

"You guys," Alice said, dropping into her seat, "have just been sat here for about two hours! You really need to get up there and dance, seriously."

James looked at me. "How about it?" He asked.

I was about to answer when the song suddenly changed to a slow song. For Merlin's sake, I'm in Gryffindor, I need to stop being so scared. "Yeah, lets go." I got up before I could change my mind.

We walked towards the middle of the dance floor, and James grabbed my hand. He stroked it softly before putting it around his neck, I complied and put the other one there. He put both of his hands on my waist and pulled me close.

"I did tell you how beautiful you are, didn't I?"

"I think you might have mentioned it." I couldn't get over how amazing this was, being in James Potter's arms. I could feel the strength he had, the power and how strong he was, and I loved the feel of his hands on my waist. I allowed my hands to play with the back of his hair. I realised that this was how I always wanted it to be; I never wanted him to let me go. I was in love with James Potter.

Was this the right time to tell him? Was standing in his arms the best opportunity I was going to have?

"James, I-" I was shoved from behind and fell into James, who caught me. I straightened up and looked around, and saw Melissa standing behind me.

"Oh, whoops, guess I didn't see you there. Sorry, Lily." She said, in a falsely innocent voice.

I was really not in the mood for this. Using all the self control I had, I merely said "Of course."

"Calling me a liar, are you?" She was clearly desperate for an argument.

"Yes, that's exactly what I said."

"Well-"

"Melissa, either shut up and go away, or I will have you thrown out." I suppressed a smug smile as her look faltered as she took in James's words.

"Have me thrown out?"

"Yes."

"You couldn't do that."

"Couldn't I?" He stepped closer to her, his voice menacing. "I organised this ball, therefore I could easily chuck you out. Now leave." He turned his back on her and walked a few steps away, with me running after him. He stopped and then turned around, and we resumed our previous dancing.

"You know," I muttered, "that girl really knows how to piss me off." I had been so close to telling James how I really felt, but she had to come along and ruin it. The moment had gone, and I didn't really know how to bring it up again.

"You're telling me." He sighed and leaned his forehead on my shoulder. He was so close that I nearly kissed him right then and there, but I restrained myself.

"James, I-"

"Lily?"

"Oh holy mother of Merlin what now!" I screamed, I looked up and saw Snape standing beside me. "What do you want? I'm really not in the mood for this."

"Yeah, just leave now, Snape." Spat James.

"No need to be rude, Potter."

"Just get to the point." I cut in.

"I wondered if you could take a walk with me." He gestured toward the doors. James's expression turned to stone. I snorted.

"No."

"Well, could I at least have a word with you?" He sounded desperate.

"No, you can't." I don't care how rude I sounded.

He turned to James. "What have you done to her, Potter?" He spat.

"Nothing."

"Normally she would at least give me the time of day."

"Snape, what did you want to talk to me about?" I was getting more frustrated by the second.

"I want to talk to you away from Potter."

"Well that's not happening. Get on with it."

"I'd rather not, not if I have to stand next to this prick."

James pulled out his wand. "Watch your language."

I stepped in between them. "Maybe you should just leave," I said to Snape, "now."

"Yeah," James said, putting his wand away, "you heard Lily, leave."

"What and let you two get back to your sickening flirting?" He looked disgusted. "I'd rather not."

"You-" Suddenly Sirius was there, holding James back while Remus grabbed Snape and pulled him away. Peter just looked on, biting his nails.

"Prongs, come on, lets go get some air. He'll be back soon, Lily." I watched as Sirius dragged James out of the hall. This couldn't have gone any worse if I tried.

I made my way over to our table and slumped down in my seat. All my girls were there, including Dorcas.

"Lily, are you okay?" I looked up at my friends, Marlene was the one who had spoken, and she reached forward to hold my hand.

"Yeah, I'm fine. I really don't want to ruin tonight by being all down."

"Just tell us what happened, get it off your chest and it might help."

So I told them. I even told them how, twice, I tried to tell James that I liked him. I told them about Snape, and how he was a conniving little twat.

"You know, I've never liked Snape." Dorcas spoke, and I looked over at her, shocked. We had never really spoken before, and, I remembered with a jolt of my stomach, I had just let her overhear that I was in love with James. Smooth, Lily.

"None of us have." Mary agreed.

"There's just something funny about him. But you used to like him, and I'm not criticising your choice in your friends."

"No, I know you're not, don't worry about it."

"Lily," Alice leant forward, eagerly, "were you really going to tell James how you feel?"

I put my head in my hands. "Yes."

"Lily likes James." I heard Marlene fill Dorcas in.

"Well then go after him!" Alice all but screamed. "Go outside, go find him, right now, and tell him!"

I looked at her. "No, Alice. The moments gone. I don't even know how I'd bring that conversation up. 'Hi James, I know I hated you for six years, and said no every single time you asked me out, but you know what, I think I'm in love with you, ask me out again will you?' Yeah, that'd go down brilliantly." I said, my voice dripping with sarcasm.

"You're in love with James?" A voice said from behind me.

Oh Merlin. Why don't I just stand on the stage and tell the whole bloody school?

"Yes, Remus, I am. I'm surprised Sirius hasn't already told you."

"Sirius knows? I don't know how he's kept it to himself. Who else knows?" Remus asked, sitting down next to Mary.

"Well, now everyone apart from James. And Peter."

"Oh Lily, you know you really ought to tell James, he'd want to know."

I was about to reply when Dorcas jumped to my defence. "Leave the poor girl alone, she'll tell him when she wants to."

"Yes, I agree, Dorcas, but she's had nearly two months to tell him!" Mary argued.

"Well maybe she hasn't been ready to tell him, and the perfect moment got ruined for her tonight, twice, so at least it shows she's trying." I suddenly liked Dorcas a lot more.

I was about to reply when I saw Sirius sit down next to Dorcas, and knew James would be coming any moment now. Sure enough, he sat down next to me with an apologetic look on his face.

"Sorry about that." He said to me. "Snape just really knows how to wind me up, that's all."

"It's fine," I said, reaching out to stroke his arm consolingly, "I know."

I glanced around the table and saw Alice staring at me, gesturing frantically to James with her eyes. I shook my head slightly, pleading her with my eyes to understand and not to push me.

.

"Lilyflower! You have not danced with me yet, this is a crime. You don't mind, do you, Dorcas?"

She smiled at Sirius. "Not at all."

"Well then," he said, jumping up and strutting over to me, "care to accompany me to the dance floor?"

I laughed at him. "Oh Sirius." I stood up and took his outstretched arm and he lead me to the far edge of the dance floor.

He stopped dramatically, grabbed my hand and began some kind of ridiculous waltz, dragging me along behind him. I couldn't help but laugh at him, enjoying myself and forgetting what was worrying me.

"You know, Lily, if I didn't know better, I'd say you were enjoying yourself!"

"Oh damn, you've got me!" I chuckled.

"And, do you also know, that I know that you know that James wants to know, and you know everyone else wants to know when James knows."

"What?"

"Tell James!"

I groaned. "Not you as well."

He smiled at me. "I know you've been taking your time, but I know that you were going to tell him when Snape interrupted you, so just get it over with and tell him. You'll both feel so much better when you do. And, I also am running out of things to say when Prongs likes to often perform monologues to me, all of them about you, of course, and how he doesn't know how you feel and doesn't know whether to ask you... excetara excetara."

I looked into his face and sighed. "Point taken."

"Good. And, as much as I have enjoyed dancing with you, I must get back to my date." He wiggled his eyebrows at me. "You never know, I may be able to sneak her off to a broom closet before the night's over."

"Seriously, Sirius, is that all you think about?"

"Pretty much."

I rolled my eyes at him as we made our way back to our table.

"Come on, Lily," he nudged my side, "don't tell me that you don't often think about it either." He winked at me.

"Funnily enough, no. I have plenty of other things to occupy my mind."

"What, so you never imagine James topless?"

"Sirius, shut up, they'll over-hear us." Were were seconds away from our friends but Sirius was not lowering his voice.

"Do you imagine him naked? All hot and sweaty and steamy and-"

"Who are you talking about?" James asked as I slapped Sirius on the arm and sat down.

"Peter." Sirius said casually.

Peter turned bright red and mumbled something about always being the victim.

Remus burst out laughing, controlling himself enough to say "Now that's something I would not like to see."

"Now, come on Moony, I myself would absolutely love to see it. Sometimes I contemplate sneaking up on him in the shower just to get a good look."

"Sirius, you're a pervert." James burst out laughing at Dorcas's comment.

"She's right, Padfoot. I've been trying to tell him that for years." Sirius merely glared at James.

.

The rest of the ball passed smoothly, and I found myself having so much more fun than I thought I would have. I don't think it could have been more perfect; the decorations looked wonderful, everything had run smoothly and Celistina seemed to be incredibly popular with the students. Five minutes before the end, we had to physically stop Peter from running up on stage and declaring his love for her, I thought James was joking when he said that earlier, but Peter is actually obsessed with the woman.

"I am sorry to inform you all, but now, the ball is over and your beds await. Goodnight!" Dumbledore spoke over the audible groan from the students, but they all, nevertheless, made their way to the doors of the Great Hall and were lost from sight.

"Well," I said, standing up, "want to get going, James?"

"Oh, I see, asking just James are we, Lily?" Marlene folded her arms and pouted.

"Well, considering we share dormitories, Marlene, yes, I am."

"Oh, yeah."

We all walked to the Entrance Hall together, but said our goodbyes there, so that everyone could walk their dates to their common rooms. Sirius had already gone to 'walk Dorcas back'.

"See you all tomorrow." I said, while I hugged Alice.

"Remember, he deserves to know how you feel." Alice whispered in my ear.

I pulled away and nodded my head. She looked satisfied with that.

"Ready, Lily?"

"Yeah, lets go." I walked over to where James was standing, leaning against the wall. I still couldn't believe how wonderful he looked.

"Tonight went really well, I'm proud of us!" James said, as we turned and started to walk towards our dormitories.

"Yeah, I think we should have just book Celistina from the start. She was better than that freaky gothic band."

"Hey," he said, pointing a finger with me, "Sirius and I like them, well, not them, we like their music, so don't go slagging them off."

"I wasn't, I merely said I thought they were freaky." I said innocently.

"Well-"

"STUPEFY!" I ducked just in time as a jet of red light flew over my head. I felt it skim my hair. I pulled out my wand and whirled around.

"Protego!" I screamed, blocking a spell that shot towards me from the end of the corridor. I squinted and saw Mucliber was the one attacking me. Avery was tackling James.

"Lily," he screamed, grabbing my hand with his wand free hand, "come on, we need to get out of here!"

Mulciber laughed. "Leaving so soon?" He sent Snape's famous 'sectumsempra' towards me, I blocked it and sent back a stunner that only just missed him.

I couldn't think straight. This had all come from nowhere. Why were they attacking us?

"What do you want?" I shouted.

"We were bored and fancied hurting some mudbloods."

James let out a roar of anger and knocked Avery to the floor, he was out cold.

"What's going on?" Snape had joined the midst now, and he had brought reinforcements. We were outnumbered. Seriously outnumbered.

"Lily, run."

"No."

"Go."

"I'm not leaving you." We could only use defensive spells, we had no chance of fighting back, there was just too many of them.

"I'll be right behind you."

"No," I said, yelling 'Protego!' at the same time Mulciber yelled 'Crucio!'. Their curses were getting worse and worse. "you won't."

"Lily, there isn't time for this, go!"

"I'm not leaving you!" I screamed.

"Fine!" He exclaimed. "Get ready."

"Come on, Potter, is that the best you can-" Snape didn't finish his taunt.

"EXPLUSO!" James yelled. The corridor blew up. Literally blew up. "Run!"

I didn't need telling twice. We both turned and sprinted to the end of the corridor, turning right at the end, still running. I didn't look behind me. I didn't look back to see the effect of James's spell on the Slytherins.

We screamed the password at Sir Cadagon and then both jumped around to slam his portrait shut behind us. We stood there panting, and, slowly, we turned to look at each other.

"What the _hell _was that?" James spat.

"Your guess is as good as mine."

"But why did they attack us like that?"

"You heard them, they were bored."

James shook his head. "No, it's more than that. I know it is."

"What do you mean?"

"There's something going on. I don't know what, but they're up to something."

"Something to do with us?"

He ran a hand through his hair and sat down. "I don't know. But we need to keep an eye on them."

I sat down next to him and put my head in my hands. "Maybe it's not you they're after. You heard Mucliber, he wanted to attack mudbloods like me." I didn't look up to see his reaction, but I felt him stiffen.

"Don't call yourself that." He said through gritted teeth. I looked up and met his eyes, they were filled with worry and concern, and anger. "And if it's true, then that's even more of a reason we need to keep an eye on them. I won't let them lay a finger on you."

"I can look after myself, James. You don't need to worry."

"I didn't say you couldn't, but what if you'd have been by yourself tonight? You're extremely talented, Lily, but you wouldn't have stood a chance."

"Maybe you're right."

"Are you feeling alright, Lily?" He asked, putting his hand on my forehead as if to feel the temperature of it, "You just admitted that I was right."

I laughed. "It's been known to happen." I said, taking his hand off my forehead. "But don't get used to it." I added.

I loved being able to just sit here and be with him, even if we weren't talking, I loved just being around him.

"Actually, James, there's something I want to tell you. I've been trying to tell you all night but I kept getting interrupted." I twisted my hands in my lap.

"Shoot."

I stalled. Should I do it? Oh, pull yourself together Lily. "I-", I couldn't get my words out. And he was just staring at me, waiting for me to speak.

This was it. It was now or never. "I think I love you." I breathed. He blinked, unmoving. My heart was hammering against my chest. Was I too late?

I let him sit there for two minutes before it all became too much for me. "James, please say something."

He looked up, into my eyes. I couldn't tell what emotion was in them. "Is it true?" He asked.

"Yes."

"You're not lying to me?"

"No."

"You think you love me?"

"Yes."

He leaned towards me, looking into my eyes the whole time. He leaned his forehead against mine, and exhaled heavily. "You have no idea how long I've been waiting for you to say that." And then his lips met mine.

The kiss was not like any other I'd ever had. It was soft, and gentle, but at the same time passionate. He wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me closer. My hands found their way to the back of his neck, and I clutched him to me. I never wanted to let him go. I couldn't believe how complete I felt. The fireworks erupting in my stomach were exploding like they had never done before. I smiled against his lips, wishing I'd have told him sooner.

He pulled away, but I wouldn't let him move very far. I smiled at him, and his answering smile was so perfect. I'd never seen him look so happy.

"I just kissed Lily Evans."

I rolled my eyes but couldn't wipe the smile off my face. "Yes, you did."

"Lily Evans," he said, taking my hands and pulling them into his lap, where he threaded his fingers through mine, "will you go out with me?"

Somehow, he still managed to look nervous. "Yes, James Potter, I will." Was all I could reply, before he kissed me again.

**A/N: Hope you liked it! For those of you who think I've got James and Lily together too soon, I wanted them to have as much time as they could together, because they obviously don't live very long so.. **

**And the dress that Lily wears to the ball is the same as the red dress Nicole Kidman wears in Moulin Rouge, only in emerald. I absolutely love that dress and thought that it would look beautiful in green, so if you're having trouble picturing the dress from my description, I'm sure you can now google it :)**

**Again, I would be most grateful if you could review and let me know what you think!**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Okay, so firstly, I need to apologise. I am so incredibly sorry for the stupidly late update. I really hope you don't all hate me. I'm really sorry! I know it's no excuse, but I have had so little spare time.. I'm applying for uni next year so I have to send my applications off, which has taken up a lot of my time, I've had coursework, my job, and I just haven't had time to get this up. Every little bit of time I had I was writing more of it, so don't worry, I hadn't forgotten it, or you!**

**Updates from now on will be slower, and I'm sorry about that. I would rather give you good chapters that have taken me a while to write, rather than rush them just to get them up quicker.**

**I would also like your opinions, what do you want in the next chapter? I don't know if you want more fluff, or more action, or if you want this to be a rocky start for James and Lily or if you want it to all go smoothly. Let me know your thoughts and opinions, because I want to give you what you want!**

**I'll stop talking now and just let you get on with reading the chapter. Again, I'm really sorry.**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

I stretched and rolled over, hoping for more sleep, but I couldn't seem to drift back off. I opened my eyes and sat up, yawning. It was 7:30 on a Saturday morning, these early mornings really had to stop.

I got up and headed to the bathroom, deciding that as I was up I might as well get ready and then get on with my mountain of homework. My emerald dress was hanging on the door.

Seeing my dress brought all the memories of last night flooding back to me. The ball, the Slytherin's, James. James. James asked me to be his girlfriend. I was going out with James Potter.

I smiled to myself as I continued to my bathroom and turned on the shower. I couldn't remember the last time I had ever been this happy. All that worrying had been for nothing. Why did I not tell him how I felt sooner? Now it all seemed so pointless, and I had wasted nearly two months thinking he didn't feel the same way.

I showered, dressed, applied some make-up and straightened my hair (using yet another spell Mary had taught me). I looked in my mirror and smiled. Everything was finally going so well, you could tell that even just by looking at me. I looked radiant, and I could not for the life of me wipe that silly smile off my face.

I left my room, eager to see James and hoping that he would be awake. A note was pinned to his door,

_Lily,_

_Gone to quidditch practice, it started at six and we only have the pitch until ten, so I'll see you at breakfast. I still can't believe that you're my girlfriend, I am the luckiest man in the world._

_Love,_

_James._

I read the note and smiled to myself at his last sentence; it was clearly the other way around, I am the luckiest girl in the world to have someone like James. Was it sad that I didn't want to wait until ten to see him? We've only been going out for a few hours and I already miss him, oh Merlin.

I left the common room and turned right, not really knowing where I was going, but just wandering in the direction my feet decided to take me. I was in such a state of happiness that I found it difficult to care where I went.

I found myself in the owlery, and remembered, with a pang of guilt, that this was the first time I had been here since we returned to Hogwarts in September. I hadn't written to my family in two months. If my mum was a witch, she would have sent me a howler by now.

I took out some parchment and a quill and sat down by the window.

_Dear mum and dad, (and Petunia)_

_I'm so sorry that I haven't written to you sooner, I'm terrible, I know. Things have just been so hectic and busy that I really haven't had the time. The amount of homework we get now is ridiculous, at least four essays a day usually! And what with Head Girl duties as well, rounds nearly every night and holding meetings with the prefects, it's a surprise that I can get anything done. Not that I'm moaning, of course, I'm so pleased to be Head Girl, so I'm giving it my everything, just like you both told me to. Me and James, the Head Boy, had to organise a Halloween Ball for the fourth years and above in two weeks. It happened last night, obviously, and it was a great success. Everything went perfectly which was such a relief! And I now have a new dress to add to the collection, dad'll be pleased, haha._

_I got Petunia's letter, but I didn't reply because she didn't want me to. The wedding with her and Vernon is really going ahead then? I'm not being nasty about him, but I think Petunia could do so much better. But if he makes her happy and he's what she wants then I'll obviously keep quite. I can't deny that I was hurt when she told me she didn't even want to invite me, so I really need to say thank you to you, mum, for changing her mind. _

_The Christmas holidays begin on Saturday 20th December, would you rather I apparate home from Kings Cross to save you both the trouble of driving there? This year has gone so quickly; it feels like only five minutes ago I was coming back to Hogwarts. I miss you both, so I'm looking forward to seeing you at Christmas, will be nice to have the whole family back together._

_I also have some news of my own... James Potter is my boyfriend. You were right from the beginning, mum, you said you knew I'd end up falling in love with him, and I have. He just makes me so happy, and I can't wait for you both to meet him, I know you'll all get on really well. And dad, please, please don't embarrass him or me by doing your protective father thing, I know you love me and want the best for me, but I can assure you that James is the best for me, and he would never hurt me, so you don't need to worry!_

_I best go now, going to head to breakfast then attempt my homework. I hope you're both okay? Send my love to Petunia._

_Love,_

_Lily xxx_

I called down one of the school owls and attached my letter to it's leg. It hooted happily as I let it fly out of the window and away from the grounds. I stood there, watching it, until the dot that was growing gradually and gradually smaller eventually disappeared from sight. I looked at my watch and saw that it was five to ten, only five minutes until James finished quidditch practice, best make my way to the Great Hall.

….

"Lily! About time isn't it?" I sat down next to Marlene, who turned to look at me. "You're normally down here way earlier than this."

"Sorry," I said, grabbing myself a croissant, "I went to the owlery to write a letter to my parents."

"I guess I can forgive you then."

I laughed. "Thanks so much!" I said, sarcastically.

"So," Mary said, who was sitting next to Remus, "how are we today, Sirius? Hungover?" I looked over at Sirius, who was looking surprisingly happy after the amount of firewhisky he had last night.

"Me? Hungover? Please. I'm as fit as a fiddle."

Remus snorted. "That's debatable."

I looked up in time to see Sirius throw his bowl of porridge over Remus. I couldn't help but laugh.

"I don't know what I did to deserve such good friends." Remus muttered darkly, wiping the porridge off his face.

"We love you too, Moony." Sirius smirked.

"You and Dorcas seemed to be getting on well last night." Alice noted.

"Ah, what a mighty fine woman she is."

"Fallen for her, have you?"

But I wasn't listening to their conversation any more. James had just entered the Great Hall, looking perfect as always, and he was heading straight for me. He sat down next to me and leant in to kiss me quickly on the lips. I still couldn't believe that I was the one who could kiss him, that those lips were only for me, no one else.

"Morning." He said, as he took my hand and intertwined our fingers.

"Morning." I replied, leaning into him. He kissed the top of my head.

Someone cleared their throat, and we both looked up. I had forgot that we were sitting with our friends. I had got so caught up I had forgotten about everyone except him.

Alice was looking smug, Mary and Marlene both looked as though their eyes were about to pop out of their sockets, Remus looked surprised, Sirius was grinning like an idiot, and Peter looked as though he was about to fall off his seat in shock.

"Are we missing something here?" Marlene asked.

I turned to look at James, hoping he would fill them in. Thankfully, he did.

"Well, as of last night, Lily is now my girlfriend." He said, raising our linked hands above the table. It felt so good to hear him say it out loud. He was mine, and I was his.

They all erupted. Alice screamed and threw herself onto me, nearly knocking me on the floor. She was closely followed by Marlene and Mary. Remus clapped James on the back, saying "Nice one, mate." Peter actually did fall off his seat this time. Sirius dived over the table and landed on James, who fell on the floor.

"Thanks, Padfoot." James said, as he brushed himself off and sat back down.

"No problem." Sirius said, smirking, as he resumed his previous seat. "So, Lilyflower finally told you how she felt, did she?"

"Took her long enough!" Mary added.

"What," said James, turning to face them all, "you all knew?"

They all went silent and looked down at the table, apparently very intent on the food on their plates.

"I didn't!" Peter squeaked.

James turned on me. "They all knew?" He didn't seem angry or upset, thankfully.

"Well, they all sort of... found out."

"I wish I had." He grumbled.

"Oh don't be silly, you did find out! Would you rather have found out from someone else, or from me?"

"Well, obviously from you..."

"Well there you go then!"

"Whatever." He smirked, leaning in to kiss me again, too briefly for my liking.

"You know, Prongs, I'm surprised you weren't standing on the astronomy tower all night shouting to everyone that you are going out with Lily Evans." Remus said.

"Believe me, that crossed my mind! Actually, I feel like I should let everyone know... Just so they know that Lily's taken." He stood up.

"James," I grabbed his hand and tried to pull him back down, "don't you dare."

He winked at me and stood on the bench. I slid as low in my seat as possible and kept my face covered with my hands, ignoring the snickers from my friends.

"If I could have everyone's attention!" I heard James shout. I groaned and felt myself turning bright red. "I feel that it is my duty to inform you all, that after seven years of denial, Lily Evans has finally admitted that she loves me and is now my girlfriend." The hall erupted in cheers and I felt my face grow even hotter than it already was. "And for the guys out there that can't understand what I'm saying; my girlfriend is off limits, end of." And with that, he sat back down again and put his arm around me.

"You are the most embarrassing person in the world." I said, putting my head in my hands.

He laughed and pulled me closer. "You wouldn't want me any other way."

I just laughed.

"So," Remus said, piling some eggs and bacon onto his plate, "what's everyone got planned for today?"

"Homework." Everyone looked at me like I was crazy. "What?" I asked.

"A little eager to get on with your homework, are you?" Sirius asked, smirking.

"We'll see if you still feel the same when it gets to Sunday night and you haven't done any of yours, and I'll just be sitting there laughing having completed all of mine today."

"We'll see."

"Yes, we will."

"What about everyone else?" Remus asked.

"I'm off to Hogsmede, apparently last night I promised to take Dorcas there. I don't really remember if I did or not."

"Ah," said James, clapping Sirius on the back, "Padfoot has finally fallen in love."

Sirius snorted. "Please, like that's ever going to happen."

"But you must like her if you're taking her out again? You never normally do that." Marlene said. I don't know if I just imagined it, but I was sure there was a hint of jealousy in her voice.

"I don't know, maybe. She's so different to all the other girls I've had..."

"Okay, stop now before you get carried away, please." Mary said.

"How was Amos Diggory last night, Marlene? I haven't heard you mention him this morning." She did seem more quiet than usual today.

Marlene turned bright red, and a sharp pain in my shin informed me that she had kicked me under the table. "Oh, erm... well, he wasn't really what I expected him to be."

"What do you mean?" Alice turned on her.

"He was just a bit... self centred."

"Did he try something, Marlene? Did he try to do... something to you?" James asked, sitting up straighter and leaning forward to talk to her.

"No, nothing like that. He didn't do anything wrong!"

"Then what happened?"

"Nothing! Seriously, he didn't do anything wrong, I just realised that I didn't like him as much as I think I did."

"But you liked him for ages!" Mary said.

"I know, and I realised that after liking him for all that time, when I finally got to know him, it wasn't worth it. I don't like him in that way any more. Now can we please drop it." She was starting to get angry, and I reckon, out of all of us, the only one with a worse temper than Marlene is me.

"Okay." Mary sighed. "Alice, want to come to Hogsmede with me today? I really need a new quill, plus I've seen a lovely dress that I want to get from Gladrags."

"Sorry, Mary, but I promised Frank that I'd spend today with him." Alice looked over to the Hufflepuff table, evidentially searching for Frank.

"Fine, I guess I'll just have to go by myself." Mary said, crossing her arms.

"Why do you need a new dress already?" Sirius asked, looking confused.

"I need to get one for Christmas, obviously."

"Christmas? That's nearly two months away!"

"Yes, but if I've already seen one that I like, I'm not just going to not get it and risk it not being there when I need it, honestly Sirius." She said, rolling her eyes.

"But why do you even need a dress for Christmas?" Peter piped up.

"Because the Potter's always have their Christmas ball." She explained, as if it should have been obvious.

"Oh yeah!" Alice gave up searching for Frank and looked at James. "Are your parents still doing that this year?"

"Think so. Can you really see mum giving up the opportunity to throw a party?" James laughed.

"And will Miss Lily be attending it this year?" Sirius asked.

I looked up at James, unsure of my answer. Did they go to these every year? I didn't just want to turn up if I was ruining some sort of tradition. Suddenly I felt slightly awkward.

"Of course she'll be there." James answered for me. "She's excited already." He said, squeezing my hand.

I chuckled. "Maybe I ought to come into Hogsmede with you, Mary. Looks like I'll be needing a new dress now."

"What's wrong with the one you've got?" James asked, turning on me, "I love the one you wore last night!"

"James, I can't wear the same dress to a ball that I've worn before!"

"Do you boys know nothing about clothes?" Alice chipped in.

"Clearly not." James grumbled. "But Lily, do you think you could go to Hogsmede another day? I thought we could spend the day together." He looked worried about even asking me this. Merlin, when was this boy going to understand that I was in love with him?

"Yeah, okay. But you do realise you'll be stuck with me doing boring homework all day?"

"Lily," he said, stroking my cheek, "homework is never boring when it's with you."

….

He sighed loudly, for the fourth time in two minutes.

"Something bothering you?"

"No." He said, putting on a forced smile.

I smiled to myself and finished off my two foot charms essay.

"Is it time for a break now?" James asked hopefully, sitting up.

"I thought homework wasn't boring with me?"

"It isn't!" He shouted, "I just think you deserve a break."

I laughed. "Yes, of course that's what you think. Well, you can have a break by going to the library and getting a book out for me please?"

"What, while you stay here?" He pouted.

"Yes, James," I laughed, "while I stay here. I should have this essay finished by the time you get back, _then_ I can have a break."

He thought it over. "Fine. Even if you're not finished by the time I get back, you _are_ having a break," he said, sitting next to me on the floor, "I will make sure of it."

I leant towards him. "Oh will you now?"

"Yes, I will."

"Mhm."

"Don't use that tone with me, Lily Evans." He took my face in his hands and bought it to his, resting his forehead against mine, staring into my eyes the whole time.

"I can use whatever tone I like, James Potter."

"That's what you think." When did his voice become so husky and sexy? I was literally melting in his arms.

"Oh just shut up and kiss me."

"You're so demanding." He muttered, smiling, as he obliged and bought his lips to mine. I swear I will never get tired of this boy kissing me; it gives me such a sense of completion, such a strong feeling I can't even begin to describe.

I pulled away from him and tried to clear my head.

"This isn't helping me finish my charms essay, you know."

"Who cares about a stupid charms essay?" He grumbled, as he pulled me close to him again.

"I do," I said, pushing him away and trying not to laugh at the expression on his face, "so no more kissing until I get this done."

He shook his head. "You're impossible."

"I know." I smiled. "James?"

He looked at me hopefully. "Yes?"

"Library?" I couldn't hold the laughter in this time; the look on his face was priceless.

He pushed himself off the floor, kissed my forehead and walked towards the portrait hole, mumbling "Why does my girlfriend have to be so stubborn?" under his breath. I watched him walk out of the portrait hole, wondering how on earth someone like me managed to have a boyfriend like that. I'm the luckiest person alive.

Think how much more time we could have had together if I'd have stopped hating him earlier. If I'd have just listened to him when he tried to explain himself to me, if I'd have really thought about why he was always asking me out, if I'd have heard his reasoning's for hexing every single boy that spoke to me, I would have known that he loved me. He truly loved me, and for so many years I had taken that for granted and broken his heart time after time after time.

Is it too early in our relationship for me to tell him I love him? We've not even been going out a day, but I know completely and utterly in my heart that I truly do love him. I fell for him hard and fast, and all of the pain and suffering I caused him tells me that he deserves to know.

A knock on the portrait hole interrupted my thinking. I headed towards it, assuming it was James, as he had rushed off before I could tell him which book I needed.

"You don't have to knock you know," I said as I opened up the Sir Cadagon's portrait, "you live here, you can just com-" I stopped short when I saw who had knocked.

"Hello, Lily."

"What are you doing here?"

"I want to talk to you."

"Well," I said, "I don't want to talk to you. Goodbye, Snape." I attempted to slam the portrait shut in his face, but he put his foot in the way and prevented me from doing so.

"Don't you dare talk to me about being polite, you bastard. What the hell were you doing last night, bringing a load of you bloody death eater friends to attack me and James?"

"That's part of what I want to talk to you about. Can I come in?" He started to step over the threshold, not bothering to wait for a reply.

I pushed him back with as much force as I had. "No you bloody well can't!"

"This is a discussion that I would rather not have outside. Let me come in."

"I don't care if you don't want to talk outside, you are not coming in."

He overpowered me; he pushed the portrait hole open and forced his way in, pushing me over in the process.

I so angry I was having difficulty controlling my breathing. "Snape. Get. The. Hell. Out. Of. Here."

"Calm down, Lily. I only want to talk."

"You only want to talk?" I scoffed, as I pushed myself off the floor, ignoring his hand to help me up. "Is that why you forced your way in?"

"That's the only way you would listen to me." He took his wand out and a I felt a wave of panic, my wand was sat next to my charms essay, which was the other side of the room. I looked back to his wand, trying to decide if I had enough time to either run out of the common room or knock his wand out of his hand to get my own, when I saw that he was only using it to shut the portrait hole behind him, meaning that I was trapped, wandless, in a room with Severus Snape. Great.

"Point that thing away from me, Snape." I spat. "Now what the hell do you want to bloody talk to me about?"

"The Dark Lord."

What? "What?"

"I want to talk to you about the Dark Lord." His face remained calm, he was acting like we were discussing the weather.

"And why would you want to do that?"

"Because I want you to join him."

I suddenly felt my blood boil and my vision turn red. "I beg you pardon?"

"Join the Dark Lord, Lily." He sounded desperate.

"Is this some sort of joke, Snape?"

"Lily, think about it, think of the power you'd have! He needs someone like you, he needs someone talented and brave and selfless, he would reward you more than you could ever imagine. Think of your family, you can protect them! The Dark Lord would not touch them if he had you on his side."

"Don't you dare ever say anything like that to me again. I would rather die than join him! I would never, ever, not even over my dead body, join him. I thought you knew me, Snape. You know I despise the Dark Arts."

"But you don't have to despise them any more! You can be part of them, you can help us make new discoveries, you can help u-"

"Shut up, you fucking idiot!" I shouted. When was he going to get the picture? "Now get the hell out of here."

"No. Not until I've made you see sense. Do you want to protect your family, Lily?"

"Don't you dare bring my family into this. They're the reason I'm fighting him."

"But you don't have to fight him any more. He will protect them for you, he can be merciful, if you join us he won't lay a finger on your family." He was getting closer to me, so that I was an inch away from his greasy hair.

"Stop trying to blackmail me. I want to protect my family more than anything, and joining Voldemort won't help! Why would he want someone like me, anyway? I'm a mudblood, in case you'd forgotten." I spat.

"Once I told him about your talents-"

"You told him?" I exploded. "Why, in the name of Merlin, did you tell him?"

"Because I'm the one who asked him if you could join." He kept his face smooth, but I could see some emotion crawling in his eyes.

"What?"

"I want it to be like old times, Lily! Where we actually spoke civilly to each other, and where you didn't hate me! And I figured the only way that would happen is if we were on the same side, so I asked the Dark Lord if he would consider you joining."

"And do you remember why I hate you, Snape?" I was so furious, I don't think I have been more angry.

He looked ashamed of himself for the first time. "Yes."

"And you also know that I'm never going to forgive you, let alone join Voldemort so that we can be on the same side."

"Just promise me you'll think about it?" He begged.

"I can promise you I won't." I replied, my voice icy. "Now get out, before James gets back."

"'James'" He mocked. I felt my nostrils flare.

"Got something to say about my boyfriend, have you?"

He recoiled. "So it's true? You're really going out with him?"

"Not that it's any of your business, but yes, I am."

"I never knew you could be so stupid Lily! Why would you go out with someone like him? You know how he is, he's a big headed idiot who is only with you to get you into bed!"

"I suggest you stop talking right now." I pulled my wand out of my pocket and he eyed it wearily.

"I managed to get all the way to the library and then realised that you hadn't to- What the hell is going on?" I whipped my head around and saw James standing in front of the portrait hole, evidently he had just returned from the library. "What in Merlin's name are you doing here?" He glared at Snape.

"I came here to ask Lily something, although I don't see why it matters to you." Snape replied, becoming defensive.

"It matters to me because she's my girlfriend. What did you ask her?" James walked next to me and lowered my wand, keeping hold of my hand. Snape's lip curled.

"I'd prefer not to say." He drawled.

"Go on, Snape. Tell him what you asked me."

He looked at me, and I could tell he was panicking. "I'd prefer not to say." He repeated.

"Well, I'll fill James in then, shall I?" He just looked at me. I felt James becoming impatient at my side. "He came here to ask me to join Voldemort."

James dropped my hand in shock.

"Is this true?"

Snape just looked at him.

James exploded. "Why? Why would you ask my girlfriend, my Lily, to become a fucking Death Eater? Have you lost your mind? I knew you were stupid Snape, but this, this is the most stupidest thing I have ever heard. Do you really think she wants to become a murderer? Do you?" James was right up in Snapes face, he grabbed the collar of his shirt and shook him.

"The Dark Lord will protect her!" Snape raised his voice to match James's volume. "He will reward her, he will welcome her with open arms! If you truly 'loved' her, you would want her to do this! You would-" Snape was cut off by James's fist in his face. James pulled his arm back to punch him again.

"James, no!" I shouted, running towards him and pulling his arm. He tried to shove me off but I wouldn't let go.

"Lily, get off!"

"James, don't do this, you're better than him!" I yelled, struggling now to contain him. "Snape, get out, get out!" I screamed at him. "And don't you ever come back in here again!"

Snape gave me a pleading look before he ran out of the portrait hole. I heard it slam shut behind him and then released James, panting from the effort of restraining him.

He ran his hands through his hair and then punched the wall in front of him. I walked forwards and wrapped my arms around his waist, leaning against his back. I kissed the back of his neck, and heard him taking deep breaths to control his temper.

"Calm down." I whispered. I rubbed my hands slowly up and down his arms, trying to soothe him.

He sighed and turned around. "I'm sorry." He whispered, before pulling me close and burying his face in my hair. I reached up and put both of my hands around his neck, and slowly started playing with his hair.

"I'm sorry." He repeated.

"Don't be." I replied. He pulled his face away from my hair and looked at me, and I could see the guilt in his eyes. The sight of it made my heart shatter. "Come here." I whispered, pulling his face to mine so I could meet my lips with his.

I pulled away after a short amount of time and looked into his eyes. The guilt was still there, but not as much as before. "Come on," I said, taking his hand, "let's go to lunch."

….

James's mood improved, thankfully, throughout the rest of the day. Mine, however, seemed to worsen. I couldn't stop thinking about what Snape had said. _"he's a big headed idiot who is only with you to get you into bed!" _I knew it wasn't true; I knew James would never do that, but part of me couldn't help but wonder if that was what he was after.

It was half eleven at night, and everyone was sat in our common room together.

Peter had, stupidly, fallen asleep next to Sirius, who was getting ridiculously excited drawing rude images on Peter's face.

Alice was taking on both Marlene and Mary at a game of wizards chess, James and Remus were sat just out of earshot of everyone, looking very deep in conversation.

I was curled up on the settee by myself, trying very hard to stay awake. Every now and then, my eyelids would droop shut of their own accord, and I would jerk back awake, hoping that no one would have noticed. I did not want to fall asleep with Sirius in the room. If he did to my face what he had done to Peter's, he would be in the hospital wing for weeks.

I must have drifted off without realising it, because the next thing I know, James's face was inches away from mine, and he was poking me lightly in the stomach.

"Sorry for waking you," he said, while he stroked my cheek, "but I thought you'd be more comfortable in your own bed."

I nodded my agreement and looked around the room. "Where did everyone go?"

"They left a few minutes ago. They could see you where exhausted and thought you could do with some piece and quiet. Now, come on," he stood up and held out his hand, "lets get you to bed."

I laughed and took his outstretched hand. "You know, I don't even think I can be bothered to walk to my bed." I put my head on his shoulder and shut my eyes.

I felt him chuckle. "Well," he said, as he put a finger under my chin and lifted my head up to look at him, "you could always share mine." He winked.

I dropped my hand from his and moved away as quickly as if I'd been burnt.

"Lily, what's wrong?" I could hear the panic in his voice, but it didn't register with me.

"It's true." I breathed.

"What is? What's true?" He shortened the distance between us and put his hands on my shoulders.

I shook him off. "Snape was right."

He stiffened. "Snape." He growled. "And what was Snape right about?"

I drew in a shaky breath. "That you're only with me to get me into bed."

James froze. I saw the anger on his face change and be replaced by pain. "What?"

"You heard."

"You believe him." He whispered. It wasn't a question; it was a statement.

I tried not to be affected by how much I had obviously hurt him. "Well, what else am I supposed to think, James? We've been together for a day, one day, and you've already asked me to jump into bed with you!"

He shut his eyes and put his hand through his hair. "That's what this was about."

"What else could it possibly be about?" I spat.

He opened his eyes and looked at me. I didn't know if it was the light, but I could have sworn I saw tears brewing in his eyes. "Lily, I didn't mean it like that. Of course I didn't. I was joking! I'm a marauder, that's what we do! Do you really think that I was chasing you for seven years just for the sole reason to sleep with you? I'm in love with you, Lily, I have been since fifth year, and do you really think I would ruin this chance I have with you by trying to get you into my bed when we've only been dating a day?"

"Probably not, no."

**He** stepped forwards and pulled me into a hug, with his arms wrapped tightly around me. I buried my face into the crook of his neck, trying to express without words how sorry I was that I had believed Snape over him.

"I can understand why you might have thought that was true, I suppose. I mean, I am a teenage boy after all, I do have hormones and desires, and I can't deny that you are the sexiest person I know, but I can control them, Lily, I'm not like Sirius, I'm not some animal that's just after some action."

"I know." I muttered into his neck.

"I'm sorry, Lily." He rubbed soothing circles into my back.

I leaned back far enough to look into his eyes. "No, James, don't you dare apologise. I'm the one who's sorry, not you. This is my fault, not yours, so don't you dare blame yourself." I leaned upwards and gave him a short kiss. "I'm so sorry."

He took my face between his hands and looked into my eyes. "I love you."

My heart swelled; it expanded in my chest to the point where it hurt. I didn't know what expression was on my face and I didn't care.

After a few seconds it occurred to me that he was waiting for me to respond. I couldn't tell him I loved him yet, we'd only been together a day, it was too soon. But I couldn't break his heart by not telling him.

So I just smiled at him and threaded my fingers through his hair. "I know."

**A/N: What did you think? Worth the wait? Please review and let me know your opinions and what you think, you don't understand how much they mean to me! I hope you all had a lovely Christmas and new year, just think of this as a late christmas present!**


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